Prostate Massage: Basics of Massaging the Male Sacred Spot

A big part of sacred sexuality is learning to love and worship the penis, the lingam, not simply as a pleasure tool, but worshipping it as a sacred wand of light and creation. The penis or the lingam has since time immemorial been revered as a powerful symbol of masculine energy, power and creative potential. A specific article is available on lingam massage on this blog at [to be published].

While for most men the penis is the focus of their sexuality and truly is the locus of the most concentrated masculine enegy, lingam massage is but a sub-ritual of a total homoerotic Tantra session, and optimally should be included with a method of achieving multiple erotospiritual cosmic orgasm, massage of the so-called “sacred spot”, the P-spot, or prostate massage, the locus of the second chakra.

Massaging the Male Sacred Spot


Homoerotic Tantra is an erotospiritual practice and involves the triad of mind, body and spirit. In order to derive the whole range of benefits from the practices and rituals, you must suspend any form of judgement, you must trust your partner completely, you must be willing to be authentic (genuine and truthful), self-forgetful (leave the ego at the door). You must be willing to surrender to your partner, and accept your responses and reactions with abandonment and freedom. In our homoerotic Tantra session we will join other esoteric traditions of erotospiritual practices that are conceived to overcome the separation of sacred (spiritual) and profane (physical sexual) love.


For most men the thought of prostate massage produces an uncomfortable reaction of curiosity and dread. But such a reaction is artifactual, and is at its origin a trust issue that must be overcome before any man can fully enjoy the benefits of homoerotic Tantra and massage as part of your erotospiritual engagement. Overcoming judgement and trust issues is one big reason why you should make prostate massage an integral part of your sexual practices; it then will become highly desirable in your erotic life and will become an enhancement of your erotic performance as well as you masculine self-esteem.

Prostate massage has been used in many traditions throughout history as a way to enhance a man’s sexual pleasure. Prostate massage is described explicitly in only a few traditions, however, and the technique described is what we call the digital massage of the prostate, either externally or internally. When prostate massage is done to enhance orgasm and produce ejaculation, we refer to it as “prostate milking.”

One of the pleasurable effects of anal intercourse is that when the penis is enters the anus the prostate is stimulated, and the ensuing thrusting motion is actually massage stimulation of the prostate. This is one of the reasons why the recipient partner’s orgasm and ejaculation during anal sex is so intense and full.

The Tantric yam-yab position allows total access to the partner’s energy points.

Prostate massage is now recognized to be beneficial therapy in men who are living with common prostate disorders as well as in its role in enhancing orgasm (more intense and multiple orgasms), promoting ejaculation (in cases of delayed ejaculation) and erectile function (as in erectile dysfunction or ED).[1]

How to do prostate massage manually[2]

Internal Prostate Massage Technique.

There are two ways you can perform prostate massage: externally or internally. There are two ways to do external or internal prostate massage: digitally or using a prostate massage too. There are two types of prostate massage tool: manual and electronic. Quite frankly, which method you use is immaterial; it’s the experience that counts. Not only does prostate massage provide a unique and intense pleasure experience, it can increase blood flow in the anogenital area, improve urinary flow, and may even contribute to prostate health in general.

As in any erotic practice, but especially in homoerotic tantric practice, there is some preparation to be done before the real interaction starts. Hygiene and preventive practices must be taken seriously to avoid injury, possible infection, and to avoid possible embarrassment.


Getting Started

If you want to give this practice a try or want to add a little flair to your sex life, follow these steps to get started:

  1. Bodily cleanliness is a must. Shower before any session making certain to give attention to the genitals and the anus. If you are uncut, gently cleanse the head of the penis and behind the foreskin.
  2. There are some preparations that you can do to ensure that the rectum is empty and clean. First of all, a high fiber diet helps. Try to have a bowel movement before your shower. You will want to douche before the session to ensure that all material is out of the rectum. Make certain everything is springtime fresh in the business areas.
  3. If you are going to use the digital method it is very important that you trim and file your nails to ensure that there are no sharp edges and no burrs that that can injure the very delicate tissues. If you are going to use a glove, a finger cot, or a condom to massage the prostate, make certain you are not using a silicone-based lube.
  4. Assume one of the positions described below or have your partner get into one of the positions. This may happen automatically as you move through a tantric session and change positions, so you can play it by ear. If you find either of you are in a good position for prostate massage, go for it.
  5. Generally, don’t break the flow and spontaneity of the session by distracting procedures like putting on a glove or similar, if you can manage to discretely put on a condom on the finger or fingers, fine, otherwise you can go skin-to-skin.
  6. Place oil based lubricant on your index finger or your index and middle finger, and lube the anus and the external sphincter anus. Of course, you can use special toys instead of your fingers, but I prefer skin-to-skin finger work.
  7. Trust is absolutely essential when performing this technique; if you and your partner don’t completely trust one another, it’s not going to work. You can try your best to be relaxed but if you don’t trust your partner, you won’t be able to be completely vulnerable and surrender to his ministrations. It may be helpful to engage in gentle ass play or even rimming before the massage; this helps to relax both of you.
  8. Always communicate with your partner. Ask if he’s ready to have you insert your finger tip for the prepping phase of the massage.
  9. Gently, tentatively and slowly Insert index finger into the anus past the external sphincter, wait a second or two, and then go in past the internal sphincter, pause, and then proceed into the rectum. I repeat: do this slowly and gently. There’s no rush and if you do it clumsily you’ll kill the moment dead as a stone.
  10. Again, communicate with your partner, and ask if he’s ready to have you insert your finger(s) to explore and massage his sacred spot. Ensure that both your finger and your partner’s anus are generously lubed or oiled. This is very important.
  11. A good insertion is to penetrate about 2–3 inches in — that’s up to about your second finger joint — and pause, allowing your partner to relax before proceeding. This will allow him to adjust his position for maximum pleasure. Usually if he brings his legs up to his chest or onto your shoulders, penetration will be improved and pleasure increased. (about your second knuckle)
  12. Move the tip(s) of your inserted finger(s) upwards towards your partner’s belly button (navel), and hold for a second or two.
  13. Now, using your inserted finger(s) gently explore until you detect a roundish walnut sized mass of tissue just in back of the penis and in the wall of the rectum – You’ve found the prostate gland; this is your partner’s sacred spot.

You’re ready to begin:

  1. If you’re in the right place, your partner will react and indicate that he’s feeling a different sensation, which he may describe as strange and/or pleasurable. It’s important to note his breathing pattern and his vocalizations. His body will tell you if you’re pleasuring him.
  2. As soon as your partner is fully relaxed and you feel a release of tension on your inserted fingers, you can start moving around the prostate. Gently massage the area all around the prostate with your fingerpad, applying gentle but firm pressure, concentrating on tracing around the sacred spot (try to avoid the middle portion). The pleasure effects produced depend on the pressure applied, the speed of your massaging movements, and type of movement and these vary from individual to individual. You’ll have to go slowly and read the feedback.
  3. There is no rush so do every action slowly, gently, responsively, paying close attention to your partner’s breathing and the sounds he is making; don’t go for the penis yet, and you may even want to avoid touching his penis in order to produce the most intense prostate orgasm.
  4. You can experiment with bringing your partner to multiple prostate orgasms (P-orgasms) as possible before you decide to move on in the session or to begin milking the prostate or orally stimulating him while massaging his prostate, or you can masturbate him or he can do himself to experience very intense ejaculation. How you want to handle the ejaculation depends on you but it’s always useful to have a towel nearby.
  5. If you bring your partner to ejaculation by massaging his prostate this is what we call “milking” the prostate. After one or several P-orgasms the ejaculation is likely to be very intense, forceful and voluminous.
  6. Add more lube if you feel it would help your movements or enhance your partner’s pleasure and comfort.
  7. If there is any pain or any indication of trauma or bleeding STOP IMMEDIATELY.

Notes:
  • During the prepping massage or foreplay, you may want to bring your partner to a full erection. This will increase his pleasure.
  • Use a lot of oil-based lube on your fingers, the perineum, around and in the anus. and on your partner’s penis. This is very important to ensure smooth and silky massage and to avoid any friction or discomfort, which will be distracting and can kill the moment.
  • Whether performing the massage ritual solo or with a partner, the best position is to lay down on your mat or on a bed (on your back, with the hips raised slightly on a pillow or cushion, heels close to the buttocks and the knees up). This positioning makes the areas of focus more accessible.
  • Always communicate with your partner in soft, gentle, encouraging tones. Be aware of his responses. Always ask permission before entering his sacred sanctuary. Slow down or pause as soon as you detect any tension around your fingers or if your partner is showing any signs of discomfort.

P-Orgasm

P-orgasm (prostate orgasm) is an orgasm produced by massaging the prostate. Achieving a P-Orgasm by internal prostate massage is not quantum physics, but you will need  a little practice with the particular partner; every man will respond differently. You have to find the best position for receiver and easy, comfortable, pleasurable access to the entire area is vital, so it is important to discuss possible positions and to agree on a position that will be the most comfortable for you and your partner. During a tantric session, you will be changing positions so you can play this by ear; if your partner is responding, you’ll both know when he’s ready.

Comfortable anal penetration

The following positions are probably the best ones for men and allow comfortable anal penetration and access to the prostate via the rectum:

  • Place your partner on his hands and knees (or you assume this position), legs slightly apart.
  • You can bend your partner over a table, a chair or the side of the bed.
  • Laying on his (your) side on the bed, a mat, the floor, the upper leg extended slightly forward but bent. This one works well when soloing.
  • Lying flat on his/your back with his/your knees up and on your/his shoulders.
  • Lying flat on his/your back with his/your knees up and his/your feet flat, knees pointing up.
  • Squatting, facing one another (this can be a bit awkward but allows deeper penetration).
  • Seated facing one another, your partner seated on your thighs, his legs and arms wrapped around you (this allows deep penetration and is a classic for anal intercourse). This is called the Tantric yab-yum position and is iconic of the masuline and feminine principles, Shiva-Shakti, in cosmic co-creative embrace.
The classic Tantra yab-yum embrace.

Note: If your partner is having a hard time relaxing and enjoying the experience, you may have to adjust your technique — you may be too forceful, too hurried, not using enough lube, or just not giving him permission to guide your actions — try this:

  • Ensure that your finger(s) and the area around and in the anus are well lubricated.
  • Insert your lubricated finger into the anus and gently probe for the prostate. The prostate feels like a small walnut. Pause, allow your partner to relax.
  • Once the prostate has been located, apply light pressure for several seconds using your finger pad(s), and then release the pressure. Note his responses.
  • Ask his permission to go deeper with your finger.
  • Advance the finger again and apply gentle pressure on the same or a different spot if you can. Hold for several seconds and then release. Note: If you apply pressure to the center or middle portion of the prostate, you may note that there is a release of clear fluid (precum) at the tip of the penis.
  • Repeat this massage method five to ten times, always noting your partner’s responses. It’s very likely he will have a strong erection, which is normal, and a clear fluid (precum) might appear at the tip of his penis, again this is normal depending on how you are massaging. But, for now, concentrate on the prostate not on the erection.

The external massage is to apply gentle pressure with a finger along the perineum, the area located between the scrotum and anus. Use some lube so that your finger glides easily along this sensitive area, and massage the entire perineum for several minutes. Find a slight bulge approximately midway between the scrotum and the anus and gently massage it using one, two or three lubed fingers. This is the external massage of the prostate.

How to do prostate massage with a massage device

If you are into adventure and variety, you may want to try using a prostate massage tool or an electronic massage device. There is a huge variety of models of both from which to choose both for internal and external prostate massage. Whether you use a tool or an electronic device use one designed only for prostate massage, and not one considered a “toy” or for multiple uses. If you use a tool or device, please study to product information carefully and know how to use it correctly. Study what’s offered on the market and carefully read reviews and other information about the products you are considering before you make your purchase and use it on yourself or your partner.

Several Examples of Prostate Massagers

If you purchase a prostate massager for internal massage, make certain you are using one specifically designed for internal use, that is, one that can be inserted into the anus and survive oil-based lube. The anal and rectal tissues are delicate tissues, so it is vitally important that you use a device that has been designed solely for this purpose.  You may find that you prefer a vibration effect and you can then consider  products that have a vibration feature. Any device for internal use must be well-lubricated before insertion and even while massaging. The vibration feature triggers when the device is pressed against the prostate, and may reduce inflammation, improve blood flow, and relax the gland.

An electronic prostate massager.

External prostate massage products are designed so you can sit on them, and may also applies pressure and/or vibration stimulation to the perineum and to the prostate externally.

The prostate is the male G-spot

The prostate is the male G-spot—which was named after the pioneering sexologist Ernst Gräfenberg—the male prostate gland can help produce intense orgasms and voluminous ejaculation. The male G-spot is located about two or three inches into the rectum, measuring from the anus.

The prostate also aids in the production of seminal fluid; all male orgasms start with the prostate.  The prostate has even more nerve endings than the penis and so it is a key to male erotic pleasure.

Of course, some men just can’t trust and surrender, so it will be difficult to convince them to allow internal prostate massage. That’s not a big problem because the prostate can be externally stimulated by applying pressure to the perineum—that no-man’s land between a man’s scrotum and, since nerve endings on the perineum are closely associated with nerve endings in the prostate, applying external stimulation and pressure the perineum will send him at least a couple of rungs higher up the ladder to pleasure paradise.

Many guys who rush into lovemaking with no preparation usually end up mixing feces in their lovemaking; I call this expecting fluffy merengue and getting chocolate mousse. So, I recommend very strongly that you ensure that you have evacuated as much as possible from your rectum prior to taking a shower, that you clean the area well, and about an hour before the session, use a rectal douche. I recommend that you douche with warm water only before your tantric session and possible prostate-massage.

I manscape and if you are a hairy man, plan to shave strategic areas; I do recommend manscaping. Manscaping means removal of excess or all hair on the body, especially in the target areas. Each area of the body has different sensitivities and characteristics so not all hair removal methods will be appropriate for all body areas. Shaving, waxing, depilatories, clipping, plucking, etc. can all be used but with caution.

Fingernails are especially important. Make certain that the nails are trimmed and all sharp edges and burrs are filed down. Always ensure that you sanitize before you eroticize. If you intend to use any sex toys or stimulation tools or devices, make certain that they are carefully cleaned and disinfected before and after the session.

Agree on a position or positions that will be comfortable and pleasurable for your partner and will allow you easy access and penetration into his anus and rectum. It’s usually tight and sensitive down there so my advice is to lube, Lube, and LUBE. Sorry guys, unlike a vagina, your male anus does not self-lubricate.  You need to find a lubricant specifically formulated for anal application and you should not be afraid to use plenty of it.

Then, when you’re in the shower, insert a soapy, well-manicured finger a few times until you’re feeling squeaky clean. This doubles as opportunity to grow accustomed to the feeling of having something inserted into your butt. At first, it’s probably going to feel like you’re going to have a bowel movement, but if you make it part of your showering regimen, you can create a new pleasurable association, quite distinct from a healthy BM.

Your partners will all be different in their responses. Some guys are going to really enjoy prostate massage right from the start. Some are going to be suspicious or even refuse to try it. Still more will react the same way that most people do when trying something adventurous: they’ll learn to enjoy it over time. Most guys who make it work for them agree that their orgasms are much more intense (and very different) than what they might experience from penile stimulation alone. Some say it’s more focused, and others compare it to energy waves flowing through a region of the body or even the entire body. It depends on the masseur’s technique and experience, whether external or internal, the pressure and motion of the massage, whether an instrument is used, and, obviously, the person receiving the massage.

Both the masseur and the receiver should understand that simply massaging the prostate for a few seconds will likely not produce orgasm, and some men may not orgasm every time, but with practice, the process has been shown to be a very effective way to achieve enhanced orgasm(s) and more voluminous cum.

This technique will cause intense sexual stimulation and arousal, and your partner will become highly aroused and responsive. Don’t be surprised if he starts moving his body in response to your insertions, urging you ever deeper into his sanctuary.

Your massaging will likely give him a raging hard-on. This is a natural response when these areas are stimulated. And we all know about spontaneous erections. Yes, a strong erection will be distracting and even tempting but it will subside shortly. Just stay focused on the massage for now.

You and your partner should also expect that he will go soft or even lose the erection spontaneously. This is completely normal and expected, and shouldn’t be a cause for concern or embarrassment. (You may want to discuss this point before starting the session, just to be sure he’s comfortable and not surprised when this happens.)

Reaching a P-Orgasm through internal stimulation is not very complicated, but it will require a little practice on your side. Before you begin, it is crucial to choose a position that will be the most comfortable for you.

Pay Attention:

  • Prostate milking should never cause any pain; it should be pure pleasure.
  • Always trim your fingernails and file the edges smooth; use plenty of non-silicon lube, preferably natural botanical oils, or a non-allergenic synthetic lube to avoid skin irritation.
  • Always communicate with your partner. Ask permission before entering his sanctuary or advancing your finger(s) deeper into him.
  • Take your time, make slow and directed movements, be gentle, and be aware of, attentive to, and responsive to his responses.
  • Homoerotic Tantra is not a competition sport or a performance contest; leave that to the sexual amateurs. Homoerotic Tantra is a form of worship and a spiritual discipline. Your partner’s body is the sacred space, the place of worship. Keep this in mind at all times.
  • If soloing, do not touch your cock when internally milking your prostate to experience intense orgasm(s); do not allow your partner to fondle himself or to assist you in the massage. Tie him up if necessary. Blindfold him if he feels compelled to watch. (Bondage and blindfolding will be discussed as techniques in an upcoming essay.)

Internal Stimulation

More Tips:

  • Agree on and bring your partner to an appropriate position that is both comfortable for him and one that will allow you complete access to all areas of focus during the massage ritual.
  • Bring your partner to a full erection.
  • Use a plenty of natural botanical oil-based lube on your fingers/toys, cock, perineum, and anus.
  • If you have them, sex toys designed specifically for prostate massage or insertion into the anus can be used for technical variety or convenience, and can be used to bring your partner to orgasm and ejaculation.
  • When you want to finish with ejaculation, there will likely be a lot of cum. Depending on your practice you may receive your partner’s cum as a gift anally, as sacred food orally, or as holy anointing. You may want to have tissues or towels at hand to collect any extra.
  • Slow down, pause, or stop if you become aware of any tension in your partner or if he shows any signs of discomfort.

Signs You Are Reaching P-Orgasm

It’s only natural that the beginner will try to anticipate when he’s getting close to a prostate orgasm and in it doesn’t happen in just the way he expects it to happen, well something went wrong. What went wrong is that he fell into the trap of expectation. He started to want to control the session and he was so insecure and unprepped, he’s worried he’s doing it all wrong. The whole exercise is about relinquishing control and just getting carried by the flow. As soon as you start worrying about technique you lose the vision.

Here are some signs that you are getting closer to orgasm when receiving prostate massage:

  • Clear fluid will appear at the opening of your cock. This is pre-cum and it is a sign that the prostate massage is working.
  • You might feel the urge to pee. This is just a neurological effect of prostate massage and does not mean that you are going to piss yourself. So relax.
  • You might have spontaneous muscle contractions around the area of stimulation. The contractions might especially occur in the pelvic and thigh areas as well as legs.
  • You might have a feeling of heat or warmth in your pelvis and genitals; this is an indication that you are getting very close to orgasm.

These are just a couple of common signs but bear in mind that each one of us will respond differently. You many not experience all of these signs and you may not experience them in this order; on the other hand, you may experience other signs not mentioned here.

Please share your experiences with me either by e-mail to gay.karuna.guy@gmail.com or leave a comment on this blog.

Homoerotic Tantra is All About Adventure and Discovery

Because of our culture and our fear of our bodies and allowing ourselves to experience pure pleasure, most men avoid anything that is related to playing with (and penetrating) their anuses. The lurid misinformation is that if a man enjoys anything like anal penetration he has to be effeminate, and not a real man. There’s nothing more masculine than the prostate; it’s just as male as a cock. Only a man can experience a prostate orgasm, and P-orgasim is an event that is so unique that you simply cannot achieve it through conventional sex. As a male brought up in the Judeo-Christian tradition or any Western tradition, the suggestion of anal penetration and prostate massage may seem aberrant or perverse but in some of the oldest and long-established religious and secular traditions it is a widely practiced discipline; you may be hesitant at first but when you are relaxed with the technique and have experienced its benefits, you will wonder how you ever enjoyed sex without it.

You will have to surrender yourself to exploding floods of cum, feeling waves of pleasure energy pass through your body, abandoning control over your physical movements, and feelings of intense emotions like joy and love. These are just a few “ecstasies” you will experience when you have included prostate massage in your homoerotic Tantric sessions on a regular basis.

To download a pdf version of this article, please click this link: Prostate Massage.


Special acknowledgement  to  (click on the image to visit ErosExoticaGay) for some of the images and information included in this essay.


[1] Note: If you know or have reason to believe you have or may have any anal, rectal, genital, prostate or other health problems, it is important to consult with your healthcare provider before you practice prostate massage either solo or with a partner.

[2] Note: In this essay and in the links provided as complements to this essay, the terms P-spot, sacred spot, prostate, prostate gland are all used interchangeably.

 

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Gallery 1: Introducing Me in Images

 I’ve put together a slideshow that goes with my Relationship Résumé and the general topic of the Homoerotic Tantra blog.

Not all of the pictures are of me personally, but all of the pictures are accurate representations of me. It’s just that I don’t feel I have to reinvent the wheel to get my points across to my readers.

Coming up next: My next post will feature the five senses: sight, hearing,  taste, smell, and, most importantly, touch in our erotic sharing. I’ll post the link [here] when I’ve published it.

Well, that’s enough talking. Just enjoy the show and leave a comment, follow this blog, or contact me directly.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

shower1hearts
William a.k.a. Gay Karuna Guy gay.karuna.guy@gmail.com

 

Vulnerability and Why it’s so Important

Vulnerability Does Not Mean an Achilles Heel.

Vulnerability is often misunderstood & confused by men with neediness; nothing could be further from the truth. It’s possible to be vulnerable to others without losing parts of yourself. By doing this, you’ll be able to restore your faith in love, trust, and intimacy.

While self-sufficiency and autonomy can help us weather the storms of life, they can also rob us of true intimacy. For a relationship to be balanced, partners must be able to depend on one another and feel that they are needed and appreciated for the support they give.

The video below discusses the difference between neediness and vulnerability. Regrettably, it focuses on male-female relationships, as do most discussions of love and relationship. I do find that if we get over the hetero bias of the speaker, we can apply what he is saying very easily to our gay relationships. I find the concepts he discussed to be very important in understanding the concept of vulnerability.


Vulnerability, Love, & Confidence in Relationships | Inside FEARLESS #44

 

Vulnerability is immersing ourselves in the joyful moments in life — daring to be present in the moment and be noticed, exposed to the other. If we are defensive and avoid any risk; if we need to control or are too independent, we separate ourselves from the experiences that give us purpose and give meaning to our lives. Love and relationship are two very risky situations, because they are fragile and, unless we are gentle with and sensitive to them, may shatter leaving us uncertain, feeling betrayed, unloved, inadequate.

If you find you’re jumping from relationship to relationship, or if you simply can’t find a partner, your “type,” you may be crippled by your fear of vulnerability, and if you dont acknowledge and reframe your fear of being vulnerable your stuck in a dead end. A fear of showing any weakness or fully exposing your true self to your partner, even if you are aware that your fear is preventing you from being totally engaged in the relationship, may chill any opportunity for love, because love requires you to expose your authentic self and to share your trust, thoughts, feelings, and desires with your lover. Allowing yourself to fall in love requires letting go of control and of the fear of being hurt or betrayed. Healthy realationship with another man is possible only if you let go of fear and believe you’re willing and able to trust and to love, and ready to reap all of the rewards and pleasures it has to offer.

Four Steps To Allowing Yourself

 

 To Be Vulnerable With Your Partner
(Source: http://www.yourtango.com)

  • Visualize yourself in an honest and open relationship and work toward allowing yourself to be more vulnerable and open with your partner.
  • Challenge your beliefs and self-defeating thoughts about accepting nurturing and support from your partner.
  • Remind yourself daily that it’s healthy to accept help from others and is a sign of strength rather than weakness. Don’t let your fear of rejection or past hurt stop you from achieving the love and intimacy you deserve. Practice being vulnerable in small steps and keep a journal, or talk to a therapist or close friend about your progress.
  • Create a more trusting relationship with a partner by giving yourself permission to be vulnerable and take risks — one where you can be comfortable sharing your dreams and being your authentic self.
We all should practice being vulnerable, in order to fully experience our relationships.
William a.k.a. Gay Karuna

 

Go ahead and kill the conversation. Ask “How old are you?”

Once sure way to kill a conversation or to invite a lie is to ask “How old are you?” in a chat or message. First of all, it shows how stupid you can be, because you are asking a question but have no way to know if the answer is the truth! “How old are you?” when you realize there are two alternatives: either the person will tell you the truth or he will lie. Your only concern is the answer, not whether it’s true or not. So why een ask? And forget the profiles! Many don’t have photos and if they do, the majority are not of the subscriber. Many profiles are incomplete or provide fake information. Most subscribers on social media have already become addicts and voyeurs, so the logical next step in their self-decepation is to subject themselves to more fake reality. How pitiful does it, can it get?



Don’t ask me “How old are you?
Ask me “How young are you?”
Even better, DON’T EVEN ASK!

I really believe in honesty, trust, vulnerability, love. I hope I’ve made that impression in my posts on this blog.
I also have a deep aversion to stereotypes and to ignorance. I hope I’ve mad that impression in my posts on this blog, too.
I’m also convinced of and committed to the value of older-younger relationships, and I hope I have made that clear, as well.


I average about 1000 new friend requests each month on Facebook. I’ve tried to filter out a lot of the new requests by asking that only men between 25 and 50 respond, and that the languages be kept to English, German, French, Italian and Spanish. I think that’s fair because I do want to respond to chats and messages but if I respond and the person at the other end doesn’t do any of my languages, were both screwed and disappointed. I think that being honest and up front saves everyone a lot of stress and disappointment.

My response usually puts an end to the communication

Another pet peeve that I have is when I respond to a message or a chat and I get hit with the idiotic question, “How old are you?” My response usually puts an end to the communication and I terminate the chat or the message exchange. Why? Because, as I’ve said a number of times on this blog, I don’t play the numbers game. I don’t care about age, income, number of men you’re juggling, how many fake friends you have, or anything other than who you are and whether you are on the right path. As soon as you ask me “How old are you?” I know who you are and that you’re on the wrong path.

In a healthy relationship age doesn’t matter.

First of all, as an advocate of a relationship type that has proved to be stable, rewarding, and loving for both partners over thousands of years of history, and memorialized in legend and in history, I have found that in a healthy relationship, age doesn’t matter. Period. I’ll repeat that because it’s important: In a healthy relationship age doesn’t matter.

There are quite a number of gay celebrities, too, who have chosen to have older-younger relatinships (9 Famous Gay Men With Younger Boyfriends).  We can thank them for bringing their relationships out into the open and using their celebrity to draw attention to the beauty of such relationships. Age is one of those stereotypes that is an anachronism, that is, it’s something that still exists today that was believed or done in the distant past, but has no relevance in today’s world. The age stereotype is a bias and a prejudice that comes from the ignorant sectors of Western society, and has no basis or foundation. It’s part of the consumerist, materialist society of sheeple who have followed the Pied Piper of marketing firms and have been struck dumb by the hype about denial of the realities of life. In fact, it’s very closely related to fear and denial of death.

Stereotypes make decisions for people who are incapable of thinking out of the box

Stereotypes don’t work and are a quick fix for fools who can’t think and make decisions about a situation on a situation-by-situation basis; stereotypes make decisions for people who are incapable of thinking out of the box, incapable of anything but tunnel vision. I have no use for such people and I have no problem letting them know that.

Think about it this way: What does a twink or a 20-something have to offer anyone? Not much. They are plagued with identity confusion, they have no idea what the world is about, they still have adolescent worldviews, they don’t know anything much, and they have no life experience. Useless, really.

So it’s these very unstable and confused people who need to know how old one is before they even talk to you. Immature? Yes!

That’s the very type of person I run from…screaming!

It’s these very unstable and confused people who want to spend time with people their own age. Why? Because they have more in common with each other. Nice try but not a very good reason. What they actually have in common, what they have to offer each other are the same confused views, the same insecurities, the same uncertainties, the same unstable relationships, the same problems, the same immature identities. That’s not exactly something I’d like to share or have in common with any partner of mine; in fact, that’s the very type of person I run from…screaming!
What does a person like that offer anyone with an ounce of sense and self-respect? Not much, to be very honest.

What I have found is that the generation of 20-30s men has produced some individuals who are capable of an identity, capable of accepting their lifestyle and orientation, and who steer well away from their immature contemporaries, seeking the company of and relationship with older men. The problems that they face and the challenges they have to confront are very unfair and do not acknowledge these young men’s courage and maturity, their dignity and their autonomy. Here are a couple that I have identified:

  • Their immature contemporaries use peer pressure, not sound arguments — how would they do that — to make life miserable for their more mature contemporaries, and to make them feel like they are somehow weird or malfunctional by seeking a relationship with an older man. “He could be your father,” or “You’re dating grandpa?!?” These immature children can’t see beyond their own infantile noses to appreciate the maturity and the precocious wisdom of their contemporary. Too, bad! They could learn much from him.
  • Another problem is parents and siblings. Few parents have any life experience and certainly fewer have any wisdom. They have their set ideas because they have never taken the time to learn anything new. It’s always easier to live in status quo than to be inquiring and open minded. Parents tend to be old before their time and if they see or hear of anyone who has not gotten stuck in the ditch of a stagnated marriage and a boring job, he has to be a weirdo. Then there’s the realization that their darling son is gay! Add bigotry and closed mindedness to the stagnation and boredom. Worse still, it’s not just “a phase he’s going through!” It’s actually a lifestyle choice he’s made for himself. Fancy that! It would be bad enough if he were attracted to someone his own age, because there’s always the hope that he’ll be disappointed by the immaturity of the relationship and that will stigmatize any hope of a future gay relationship, or so the parents pray. But NO! he’s attracted to an older man, perhaps an older man more successful in some ways than the parents themselves. So add to everything else the generation issue, and you have a witches’ brew of challenges that the poor kid has to face just to be happy. Far from the selfish parent’s minds is the fact that perhaps the kid might be happy, might have found some stability, might actually learn something valuable about life, and may have found true love and a stable relationship. All they can think about is how different it is from their own disappointing lives. My advice to those parents is simple: “You gave him life, now let him live it!” It’s that simple.
  • Now, we all know that there are some men who want to date boys, not young men, and society has stigmatized such relationships. I can’t say I can really advocate such relationships because there is not only an age difference, sometimes a very significant age difference, but there’s the question of mental age and whether either party to the “relationship” is really benefiting from the relationship in terms of longer-term values; usually it’s just a bizarre fling and both parties end up as damaged goods.
    In contrast, there is the relationship between the older man and the younger man, both men being comfortable in their own skins and both men knowing why they are in the relationship. In such relationships, even if the age difference is quite substantial, we can find all of the elements essential to a healthy and durable, stable life-partnership: trust, vulnerability, surrender, authenticity, loyalty, communication, physical attraction, a healthy sex life, a love of adventure and exploration, dignity, etc. There’s also an element of fun and playfulness, especially when the older-younger couple make their pubic appearances in a restaurant, in a club, at a bar, on the beach, walking together, and being generally demonstrative, loving, affectionate in a critical, puritanical, and stuffy society. I’ve found myself and my younger companion looking at each other and just bursting with laughter when a server approaches and says something like, “Oh, is this your son?” We would usually regain control soon enough to simply respond, “No, he’s my boyfriend.” And the look on the server’s face is enough to make everything worthwhile, including the bigotry and prejudice of the world we share with the “others,” including many paranoid and less happy gay men.
  • But reality is what it is and we have not only to deal with the “others” in our world but we also face challenges among those in our own culture, the gay males. Older-younger couples tend to cause a certain anxiety in both the younger crowd and the older generation. On the one hand, there may be very conspicuous envy. There’s also the sense that culturally there’s something dissonant about an older-younger relationship; no real facts and no real reasons why but there’s a sort of suspicion that someone’s being used in the relationship — that’s the mindset of the immature and the insecure — you can’t have a relationship without extracting some sort of profit. That’s pathetic at best, pitiable in fact. People who are constantly seeking their “type” or Mr. Perfect are doomed to failure and unhappiness. We are all human beings, all unique, all different, all similar in different ways, all imperfect, all worthy of love. There is no “type” and there is no “my type” or “your type.” As soon as you use the word type, you are objectifying another human being and depriving them of their freedom to be who and what they are, compressing them into a mold to suit your selfish expectations.

Worse still, many gays, younger and older, are still looking for Mr. Perfect, your perfect match; if you’re one of these you may be even more unfortunate, more unrealistic, more deluded. We see a lot of guys posting gorgeous models, perfectly posed, highly cosmetized, made up, and airbrushed on social media like Facebook. Closeted pervs with fake names and fake profiles are so pathetic as to post comments and “likes” in response, but betraying their own pathetic impotence and voyeurism, their own distance from reality. Hidden behind all those “Yums,” and “likes” and “loves” and other truncated, abbreviated emoticons is a statement that they’ve lost touch with real people, and have to resort to jerking off to fakes. But many of these guys are the ones who will ask “How old are you?” or will lie when they are asked, and it’s these types who post fake profile pictures of themselves, or engage in really serious deception. Time to clean up your acts, guys! Time to get back to the real world. Time to look in the mirror and start admitting the truth about yourself.

I’m using the YouTube program above because I reviewed the actual discussion and I found it to be a load of bullshit, to be very honest. Three queens who like to hear themselves talk; actually three stereotypes playing their parts purrrfectly. I would be remiss if I weren’t to mention all of the life coaches and advice givers on the Internet and Youtube who are all too ready to spread misinformation, even stereotypes and bias, to anyone willing to log in and search for their bullshit sessions. They tend to give advice as if they had the world by the pubes, as if they had the perfect experiences, as if they were blessed with esoteric knowledge about everything from bottoming to erotic intelligence and beyond. Look, guys, no one has all the answers and anyone out there who wants to fill your mind with “their experiences” and make you think that their fantasies can be yours has to be seriously scrutinized.

Another similar Dear Abby advice-giver, actually a narcissist who delights in sharing his exhibitionism on media like Youtube is Davey Wavey.

 Davey Wavey and Internet celebs like Tyler Oakley all have their audiences and all have their sordid and lurid advice to give but they represent a different culture, a different demographic than the large majority of us actually live in. Far from expertise, Wavey and Oakly only fuel titillation or activism in the gay community. Entertainment value? Maybe. Good guidance? Unlikely.

When two men come together they generate a special male mystique.

Every man I have ever met, regardless of his age, has been unique and filled with a mystique that is his and his alone. I can say the same of myself. The situation that is uniquely created when two men are attracted to each other either spiritually or physically is incredibly complex, deep, and mysterious that no two moments shared by them have ever existed before and will never exist again. The simple fact of the attraction is filled with mystique and can’t just simply be explained away by dick size or eye color or physique; to reduce it to such an explanation would be idiotic. We each have to experience the other at the particular time he enters our life, in the moment, and we have to allow ourselves to be vulnerable to the totality of the physical, mental and spiritual experience that is novel, unique and special to that encounter. No pundit can substitute for your own total surrender to the experience. It’s entirely up to you how you live the encounter and what meaning you find in it, how you grow with it.

Now, I am completely aware that some of my readers are going to get all pissed off and say that I’m exaggerating and that not all 20-somethings and 30-somethings are immature, uncertain, etc., and I’d have to say you are quite correct. But having said that and admitting the truth of some of what you say, I expect you to do the same: Admit that what I have said in this article is generally very real and very true.

And so, my friends, let’s think before we open our mouths, and let’s open our minds before we open our mouths. We have made great strides in achieving acceptance of our lifestyle and in accepting ourselves in the face of many internal and external challenges, crises, dilemmas. We don’t need to place stumbling blocks in front of our brothers seeking happiness; it’s wrong to become a speed bump in our brother’s road to love and relationship. It’s wrong to carry the baggage of stereotypes, bias, bigotry, prejudice and to dump that garbage we have fought against since the Stonewall riots on our brothers who, upholding the best values of our lifestyle, may make their personal choices that may differ from the mainstream, the choice of an older-younger relationship.

Most of you have to start thinking out of the box, get rid of the tunnel vision, and start appreciating human beings for what they are rather than what you think they should be. Age is a number, if you are lucky you might experience it; if you are unlucky, you’ll age but you won’t learn. That’s a fate worse than growing old.

And so, my friends, let’s think before we open our mouths,

and let’s open our minds before we open our mouths.

Love One Another!
William
a.k.a. Gay Karuna

Why men should prefer partners more mature, older than themselves.

Advance Tip on an Upcoming Article

I am going to write about this important topic from the standpoint of the more mature partner’s role as mentor, protector, stabilizer for the younger man. When I refer to a younger man, I won’t be writing about man-boy love or men who are not at a psychological or mental level of development that allows them to move beyond childish infatuation or adolescent confusion; I will be discussing younger men who are well-adjusted, secure, good in their skins, and who have self-respect and can take charge of their lives without having to be dependent. The older man is the partner who has the life experience and knowledge, practical and/or academic, and the wisdom to be mentor to the younger man. This type of relationship is built on a concept of beauty and eroticism expressed in trusting and awareness, surrender to each other in physical and emotional, as well as spiritual touching and sharing; both explore the other, surrendering himself to the other without abandoning his own essence in the nurturing and growing process. This is what I will call “inviolable vulnerability.”

The essay is in process at this time but I do want to give all of my readers a heads up on it. I feel it is an important article and will be a lead-in to articles on beauty and silence in relationships.

Peace and joy to you!
William

The Tiger and the Butterfly Spirit Guides. Why my tattoos?

A totem animal is a spirit animal is and animal being, sacred symbol of a tribe, clan, family or individual. Tradition provides that each person is connected with up to nine different animals that will accompany him through life, acting as guides. Here’s a reflection on what I feel are my personal animal spirit guides.

“Tiger, tiger, burning bright in the forests of the night, what immortal hand or eye dare frame thy fearful symmetry?” [William Blake]

It’s not always apparent which animal totem is one’s principal spirit guide, and most people are generally unaware even of the animal symbol representing one’s spirit, soul, or true self. That was true for me, even though for years I had a special attraction for tigers and butterflies. I never thought Why? that was or even gave it a second thought, until I decided to get a tattoo. When I got my first tattoo I responded,  “A butterfly” when the artist asked me what I had in mind. My first tattoo was a very small but colorful butterfly, and over the years it faded, probably because I really didn’t take proper care of it.

Then, a couple of years ago, I noticed the guys in my gym sporting larger and multiple tattoos, and so I became interested in getting my old tattoo either removed or tattooed over with a more vibrant one. My first visit to the tattoo artist met with the same question after we discussed what to do with my old tattoo. “What do you have in mind?” My immediate answer was “I want a tiger and a butterfly, but together.” “Together? How together?” My answer sparked a surprised look on the artist’s face. “I want the tiger in the butterfly or the butterfly in the tiger, if possible both/and.” His response was, “Give me a week to figure this out.”

Two Spirit Guides:
The Tiger and the Butterfly.

I returned after a week, and he had some pictures and drawings ready for me. My attention was drawn two two pencil sketches, and I imagined what they would look like in color. They became my final choices. I left the coloration to the artist but they had to be “vibrant.”

That’s an interesting word we threw around during the sessions, “vibrant.” There are a number of meanings for the word “vibrant,” including full of energy and enthusiasm, spirited, lively, full of life, energetic, vigorous, vital, animated, dynamic, stimulating, passionate, fiery. They certainly apply to my choice of totems, and I thought, “They actually describe my personality, my soul.” As for the colors, they had to be bright and striking, vivid, strong, rich, bold. Oranges, blacks, yellows, greens taken individually didn’t do much to turn me on but then, much later, after the tattoos were finished, I noted one day when describing them to a workout partner, that they were really two poles, the warm and the cool, they were opposites working together. These two seemingly opposite animal types actually represented opposites and together worked a special dynamic.

Right Shoulder Art

As I became more fascinated by how naturally these many factors came together in a sort of symphony, conscious and unconscious, I felt I had to learn more about these symbols, which I felt were always part of me but now were physically part of me, visible for all to see, and doing their magic as part of me.

Body art is one of the earliest forms of artistic expression known to humankind. It has been used to indicate status, religious devotion, desired protection against evil and disease, and much more. At times, body art was, and in some cultures, still is stigmatized, being associated with marginal elements in society. Rightly so! Those of us who surrender ourselves to the needle and the pigment are marginal: we are in some, many ways metaphysically different.

Tattoos, I believe, are not just a way of turning your body into a living, moving billboard, and I believe that covering the body with a collage of multiple tattoos is actually ugly. I feel that quality should take precedence over quantity, and that each modification of the body should actually enhance the “beauty” of the body. Each and every modification made to our body should be done only after careful reflection and after having discerned the spiritual reason for making a permanent change to the already naturally beautiful form and substance of the body.

Left Shoulder Art

Like a jug, the container, the physical form gives shape, it’s the space within that gives it a purpose, a meaning. The same with the human being; the physical form, the shape is formed around purpose. Taking that thought a step further, it is what is within that shapes what we perceive an object or a person to be through the medium of the physical senses, but it’s not necessarily what the person in reality is in their being, their essence. Of all the many hypotheses offered by psychology and religion for Why? a person chooses to become a living palette for art one of them is older than psychology or even philosophy itself: it’s to express a certain spirituality, mysterious, wordless, powerful.

Today, people express many different reasons for getting various forms of body art. Some of them are a means of personal expression, while others continue to decorate their bodies as a means of commemorating an important event/time in their lives, or as in my case, a response to something mysterious working from within.

The Tiger Spirit Guide or Totem

The tiger is a symbol of passion, power, devotion. The tiger hunts at night, and night is the realm of the unconscious, of the deep mind, the spirit The tiger symbolizes  of sexual energies, which can be creative or destructive. But the tiger is also a fierce protector and guards the passions, allowing only the most loving sensual passions to emerge.

The tiger spirit not only produces the most loving, protective, sensual passions but also symbolizes new adventures, and the dynamic to pursue these challenges with focus and dedication.

William Blake recognized the mystique and the mystical about the tiger when he wrote, “Tiger, tiger, burning bright in the forests of the night, what immortal hand or eye dare frame thy fearful symmetry?” Blake reflects on the tiger symbolism as fiery. “burning bright”, in the unconscious realm, “in the forests of the night,” and fearsome, so much so that Blake ponders how powerful a Divine being would need to be to fashion such a creature that embodies beauty, symmetry, fierce power, awe-inspiring strength, and yet is fluid and balanced, passionate, dedicated, protective.  Metaphysical imagery frames the tiger as being associated with inner strength , and an almost predatory focus and courage.

Tiger also symbolizes a sort of unpredictability, and when the tiger is aroused and responds the results are swift, sure and decisive. Dealing with the tiger is not the time for making rash decisions or foolish moves. Choose your battles wisely, in other words.

While all of the above is certainly not negative, assuming you are respectful of the spiritual power you are dealing with, there is a clearly positive aspect: when you keep the tiger spirit close to you, in your life, the person embodying the tiger spirit can act as a powerful reminder of overcoming obstacles and fears by reclaiming a place of empowerment. The person embodying the tiger spirit has an ability to manage strong emotions effectively. There is a caveat, of course: some people would find the person embodying the tiger spirit to be unnerving, or might find themselves uncomfortable in the presence of such a person.  Such discomfort might indicate that they feel or threatened by the mystery or strength of the person or a situation, and that they might need to reassess their relationship with that person or situation.

When you encounter a person embodying the tiger as his spirit animal it is wise to treat the encounter with the utmost reverence. The tiger spirit will teach you patience – when to move, when to remain still and quiet, and in the end experience a successful “pursuit.” The tiger spirit will not tolerate carelessness or procrastination when the path is clear for the next great leap.

The person embodying the tiger spirit can provide his partner or companion with strength and support for nurturing great  spiritual growth. Watching, experiencing the man embodying the tiger spirit managing the many day-to-day challenges of life, great and small, can be likened to the tiger teaching its cubs to hunt, the challenges are learning tools. These can weary the spirit of the ordinary, insensitive person but the tiger spirit  stands ready with a raw power that urges the sensitive man forward. Just as the wild tiger in nature is known for his  amazing bursts of energy, the tiger spirit person can exploit that resource to confront any challenge.

The man embodying the tiger spirit yearns for adventure, and he can stare down a statue! There is little that can stand in his way when he focuses in on something. The tiger spirit can be overwhelming if it is not received by a partner or companion with courage and respect; while the tiger spirit is controlled and focused, moderated by a strong sense of right, compassion, empathy and sensitivity, it can roll over weaker spirits who don’t have the good sense to make way. The temptation to stand and oppose the tiger spirit, asserting one’s self for the sake of the ego, the false self, typically happens early in the spiritual relationship. As you mature with Tiger, that temptation to assert comes under greater control. In the meanwhile use a chrysoprase crystal to help cope with any anxiety or discomfort arroused in the early stages of the relationship with Tiger.

If your significant other embodies the tiger as his spirit animal your relationship and sexual expressions are or will be very intense. He will love you completely in his focused way; you will fill a very special niche in his life but don’t make the fatal mistake of expecting to fill all the niches of his life; you’ll burn out trying. He will cherish you fully for what you are, and he will have a strong desire to parent and to protect. This is why a man embodying the tiger spirit is ideal in a relationship between an older “daddy” type man and a younger “son” or “mister” type man. Tigers excel in their mentoring and protection roles and keep their partners close for sharing, intimacy, and spirituality.


The Vibrant Healing Properties of Green – The Chrysoprase Crystal

It might now be appropriate to say a word here about the chrysoprase crystal if a tiger spirit has found its way into your life. The entry of a person embodying the tiger spirit into your life will usually signal a significant change, since most people are attracted to a tiger spirit because they sense the power, sensitivity, and strength of the tiger spirit. Again, when dealing with any tiger situation, caution is advised; you can easily become a meal. When attracted to the tiger spirit, you should take it as a sign that you may be in need of and must be willing to enter into a physically,  emotionally and spiritually transformative experience. This is where the chrysoprase crystal may provide you with some energetic support.

The chrysoprase crystal is sought out for manifesting optimism, joy, and happiness; it is an effective prescription for encouraging a more positive outlook on life.

If anxiety and uncertainty roll in on gale-force winds rattling the shingles of your natural tranquility, it’s time cuddle close to your tiger spirit man and to keep your chrysoprase crystal close, reflecting on meaning meditating on the heart chakra. The activation of this energy center allows for a stronger flow of healing energy through the heart, and brings you closer to living from the heart and draws on the universal power of erotic love and inner beauty.

Chrysoprase is a variety of chalcedony, and was a favorite of Alexander the Great, who called on its spiritual healing powers during his campaigns. To me, that’s a persuasive pedigree.

The chrysoprase crystal is part of the pale blue green color ray. Imagine tropical emerald waters brushing against white sands at the edge of the forest, the abode of the tiger spirit, your protection and source of sensuality. In a meditation, let the stone transport your spirit there anytime, and you can reach out to the man embodying the tiger spirit. Let his ancient wisdom guide you to a divine light of inner truth and enlightenment as you float down a turquoise river of inner peace, illuminated with a brilliant white light, the white light of pure love generated by a pure heart.

Love means self-sacrifice, letting go when necessary, taking back control from the ego. There’s always the perception that there’s a fine line between self-preservation and letting go of the urge to control, living for the other, controlling the urge to possess; the cooling and healing properties generated by the chrysoprase crystal are beneficial for supporting the delicate balance of emotions. Forgive and learn, or be emotionally paralyzed. Chrysoprase can remind us how good it feels to be free of toxic emotions and the stresses of consumerism and materialism. The man embodying the tiger-spirit cherishes a balanced state of mind, a state of spiritual alignment, and that state is a first step towards healing your former defective spirit,

Concentrate on your pure and self-less intention, on surrender, on forgiveness, positive inner growth, or encouraging hope in your life.

The heart chakra stones such as chrysoprase, rose quartz and jade are thought to attract the abundance of Eros, which associates it closely with challenges of erotic relationships and the creative force they incarnate.

The vibrant green in the eye of the tiger is reminiscent of the chrysoprase crystal and its energies.

The man embodying the tiger spirit can be a natural guide for you in times when you feel confused, particularly morally or ethically. If he is your partner or companion, you have great wealth to draw on and the tiger man is very freely giving and generous, not looking to exact anything but your love, loyalty, trust in return.

Tiger men have an independent streak – and need periodic alone time even if his  partner thinks he understands him completely. Know from the start you can’t chain or tame a tiger, you have to let him be a tiger. Gratefully accept the space you occupy in his life, try not to be demanding, it’s not necessary. The tiger spirit anticipates and reads your needs even before you know them yourself. Do not try to change the tiger man; to change him would be likened to attempting to change the stripes on a living tiger. Do not try to cage the tiger man; he’ll break free in an instant. Be still, quiet, patient like the tiger spirit.

Wild Tigers have excellent night vision. Applied to the man embodying the tiger spirit, that spirit’s spiritual effects improve at night by the light of the moon; the tiger spirit is at home in the dark forest of the unconscious, the home of the passions. Tigers, like other cats, also respond deeply to touch; the man with the tiger spirit will place great meaning on being touched, explored, and responding with touch and exploration. The tiger spirit’s touch is not restricted to the physical but is equally at home in the psychological and the spiritual. If you’re not into touching and being touched, steer clear of the man embodying a tiger spirit.

The Tiger’s Eye

Many people embodying the tiger spirit animal carry the image of the tiger when they are embarking on a quest or an adventure or confronting a challenge! This is particularly opportune for the man wanting to immerse himself in a new environment or relationship, in studies, or in other cultures with all their novel believes and values. The fact that tigers have excellent hearing also applies to the man embodying the tiger spirit: he hears everything, even the unsaid, and is an excellent listener. A partner with keen sense of hearing and listening skills makes the experience all the more rewarding because the unsaid or innocuous small things that others might miss are picked up by the tiger man. What you might think may be on the edge of awareness will be in the tiger man’s clear peripheral vision.

Call on Tiger as your Power Animal when you need renewed confidence. There is nothing uncertain with Tiger energy and medicine – this cat is the perfect embodiment of elegant power. As Tiger energy guides she teaches self-actualization – you begin to feel comfortable in your own skin and even revel in it. That is why Tigers often come to those who have poor body images or low self-esteem. Tiger men are also valuable partners and companion to those who are addicted to consumerism and materialism, or to rivalries that sap a man’s inner and outer strength. The tiger man’s sense of balance, harmony and fluidity are a source of security to those who might feel lost, confused, drowning.

In terms of spiritual growth and awareness, Tiger is all about keeping your eye on the prize. Whatever your goals are energetically, Tiger as a Power Animal provides tireless discipline and energy. From a Shamanic standpoint Tiger symbolizes healing, the immune system and clearing environmental toxins from your system. The tiger man is an excellent detoxifier, energizer, and source of empowerment.

Butterfly Symbolism & Meaning

When a man embodying the butterfly spirit begins visiting your life, something new and wonderful is about to unfold! It’s time for personal growth and greater awareness of your mental, physical and spiritual being. Change can sometimes be challenging and confusing because it moves us out of our comfort zone but you  cannot embrace a “new” until you release the “old” you. The man embodying the butterfly spirit can show you that can fly confidently above and beyond the obstacles, physical, psychological and spiritual, that would otherwise hold you back.

The man embodying the butterfly spirit as a mentor will place considerable emphasis on movement –from one state in our physical, psychological and spiritual exploration to another, more advanced level.

The butterfly spirit helps us to turn our thoughts inward to review our character, morals and habits and to move closer to identifying our natural self, our pure self that is our unique self and not a product of what others want to make of us.

The outcome of the relationship with the butterfly-spirit endowed ally is a positive restoration to an enlightened being, relieved of excess baggage, you can dance Eros’ dance with unbridled love!

The butterfly spirit as an animal guide spirit has many appearances and attributes. Early Christians interpreted the butterfly in nature as a symbol representing the soul and its journey. Native Americans venerate the butterfly as the symbol of transformation, happiness and the diversity of nature. In Chinese tradition newlyweds were often given gifts bearing two Butterfly images to symbolize marital happiness and harmony, probably because of the bilateral symmetry of the butterfly’s wings and their rhythmic beating in flight.

The man embodying the butterfly spirit emphasizes simplicity and simplification. For the butterfly spirit it’s simple: just go back and care for the basics. The butterfly spirit doesn’t change nor does he want to change his partner. Like the butterfly in the field, he visits his partner and tastes his sweetness but doesn’t damage or change him. The man embodying the butterfly spirit tends those in his life just like the butterfly tends the flowers in the field; he opens his senses to the nectar and aroma of living in the moment and sharing that moment, reciprocally, with his partner. When possible he savors and rests; do what you can now. At other times, he lingers searching, mindful that quality learning and relationship rarely happens in one visitation. Slow, mindful changes are the ones that last a lifetime, laying the foundations for enlightenment and self-actualization. The butterfly spirit held within will emerge from its inner work when the time is right, with fresh insights and intentions to guide his partner to the next stage in his spiritual growth.

The butterfly spirit embodied in a man whispers softly of his hidden potentials but frequently these will surface on their own when needed, that is, when the time is right. We can recall the proverb that says, “There’s nothing in a caterpillar that knows it’s going to be a butterfly.” But the awesome transformation from caterpillar to winged beauty happens, and it happens quite naturally. Before this can happen, however, the caterpillar eats voraciously as only a caterpillar can do. So, too, the man embodying the butterfly spirit, while still in the caterpillar stage, feeds his soul voraciously with new  experiences, new knowledge, until it’s ready for integrating  new truths.

As the butterfly in nature is the picture of happiness and vision. The man embodying the butterfly spirit brings a spiritual lightness to being; he brings a vision that provides vital color and greater clarity.

The butterfly in nature and unusually keen visual perception and can even see wavelengths invisible to human beings, such as ultraviolet light.  The man embodying the butterfly spirit, too, has keen vision and can see colors most others can’t perceive; he glimpses angels as well as demons.

The man blessed with the butterfly spirit has a natural lightness of spirit! He loves natural beauty and the beauty of nature, and is guided by the what is morally and ethically good when it comes to maintaining balance in relationships, the environment, the cosmos.

The man embodying the butterfly spirit is by nature social, engaging, attractive and vibrant. He endeavors to live in the moment, and to live each moment fully; he celebrates life and like the wild goose in migration follows an invisible path to his destination.

Spread Your Wings!

The beauty in life is the opportunity for transformation, for movement. Every moment brings a change, we just have to be awake to take advantage of the meaning and the growth it offers. The butterfly spirit can manage radical, complete change and facilitates the process with gentleness, regenerating breezes and a kiss of beauty.

During migration, monarch butterflies will travel thousands of miles and will amazingly find their “ancestral” trees; the monarch ‘grandchild’ or even ‘great-great grandchild’ butterfly will find the exact same spot that their grandparents sheltered in after their migration.

This ancestral behavior or cellular memory of their ancestor’s behavior observed in the monarch butterfly is analogous to the butterfly spirit’s exploitation of traditional or ancestral wisdom by tapping into ancient knowledge in the repository of archetypal, collective consciousness.


I hope that this article has inspired you to look into yourself to find your animal spirit guide, and to discover how that inner power can make you a better, more beautiful person for yourself, for your partner, for the entire universe.

Namasté! Peace to you!
William

A Prologue

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Touch is Communication, Inquiry, Exploration.

Welcome, Friend:

This blog is about gay male relationship and spirituality, a Tantra of Gay Companionship.

Please make this effort a success by sharing honestly and generously.

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Looking forward to hearing from you very soon! And thanks for being traveling my travel companion!

William