Venerating and Worship of the Masculine Wand of Light: Lingam Massage

A big part of male sacred sexuality is learning to love and worship the penis, the lingam, not simply as a pleasure tool, but worshiping it as a sacred wand of light and creation. The penis or the lingam has since time immemorial been revered as a powerful symbol of masculine energy, power and creative potential.

While for most men the penis is the focus of their physical sexuality and eroticism, and while it is truly the locus of the most concentrated masculine energy, lingam massage is but a sub-ritual of a total homoerotic Tantra session; its chakra is located at the base of the penis and is associated with the first or root chakra (located in the perineum in the male). I recommend that lingam massage be optimally included with a method of achieving multiple erotospiritual cosmic orgasm, massage of the so-called “sacred spot”, the P-spot, or prostate massage, the locus of the second chakra. (Click here to read my essay on Prostate Massage.)


Homoerotic Tantra is an erotospiritual practice and involves the triad of mind, body and spirit. In order to derive the whole range of benefits from the practices and rituals, you must suspend any form of judgement, you must trust your partner completely, you must be willing to be authentic (genuine and truthful), self-forgetful (leave the ego at the door). You must be willing to surrender to your partner, and accept your responses and reactions with abandonment and freedom. In our homoerotic Tantra session we will join other esoteric traditions of erotospiritual practices that are conceived to overcome the separation of sacred (spiritual) and profane (physical sexual) love.



 Introduction

A big part of sacred sexuality is becoming comfortable in worshipping the penis as a sacred organ and the site of the greatest concentration of masculine spiritual energy, and to reverence it through ritual manipulation or massage.

The lingam massage I am describing you can be done two ways. The first method is for men to learn when soloing, so they can practice edging on themselves during masturbation.

In the second method, a partner gives the receiver the massage. It can be a separate ritual unto itself or it can be a form of prepping or foreplay before tantric sex.

In Tantra, we connect with our partner on a deeply personal and on a spiritual level. We also connect with the universal sexual chi or life energy that is in our partner’s body as an energetic creative life force. One way to do this is through lingam massage. An oversimplification of lingam massage would be to call it an exotic hand job. But the difference is that lingam massage is performed as a sacred ritual mindfully, reverently, trustfully, and in a spirit of self-forgetfulness and self-emptying, being aware of and responsive to your partner as both the giver and recipient of a priceless gift.

Unlike your profane hand job, the lingam massage involves not only skilled ritual massaging and stroking of your partner’s penis, it can also include more advanced erotic massage technique, including stimulation and manipulation of the scrotum and balls, perineum, the anus, and the Sacred Spot (the prostate).

Lingam is the Sanskrit word for penis and loosely translates to “wand of light.” In Tantra philosophy, we approach the lingam, or penis, from a place of the utmost love and respect. By bringing a partner pleasure through his “wand of light,” we share and are filled with that same creative energy or “light“ in a sensuous, erotospiritual exchange of energy in giving and receiving pleasure, joy and love.

Lingam massage is a ritual that truly honors a man and his masculine power but we perform the ritual also to give him physical pleasure and ecstasy, and orgasm. Your partner’s penis is the tabernacle of a tremendous amount of sexual energy or chi, and knowing how to stimulate and circulate that energy is very powerful gift.

Statues of the Shiva lingam, a symbolic representation of god Shiva, represents a state of meditation. Lingam (Sanskrit: लिंगम्: liṅgaṃ, literally a sign, symbol or mark) is an abstract or aniconic representation of the Shaivite Hindu deity, Shiva. For Tantric practitioners the Shiva lingam embraced a secret meaning: that this powerful divine energy is present in the male body, most concentrated in the penis, which contains the most masculine essence concentrated in one place.

In order to engage your partner in sacred homoerotic sex you need to approach your male partner’s body as a holy temple and his penis as the most holy part of his entire physical body.

Sacred sex is not just one orgasm, one ejaculation and being finished, only to roll over and go to sleep. Sacred homoerotic sex is about learning to ever escalating levels of love, joy and pleasure that will mature into waves of multiple orgasms during the massage session. In order to achieve this ecstasy, you will perform lingam massage or tantric penis massage on your partner.

The ritual described below can be performed solo in order to practice masturbation and energy control, or you can perform it on your partner in a mutual ritual for joy and love, and to train for energy control.

For ease in understanding let’s call the giving partner the “masseur” and the receiving partner, the “recipient.” This will make it easier to follow the ritual acts and movements.

The session can begin with a short bath ritual, if appropriate facilities are available. In the alternative, the ritual bathing can be done in the shower and combined with energetic and sensuous touching. The ritual bathing and touching will ease any initial anxiety and is preparation for the homoerotic Tantra session and the massage rituals.

Briefly, we start with a gentle massage of the inner thighs, moving up to the genitals, the perineum and slowly moving to the sacred spot (either externally or internally). This technique will stimulate an inner relaxation which aids the hip and adductor muscles to relax and butterfly. When this configuration is maintained naturally and in conjunction with focused breath-work your partner will feel a pleasurable “ballooning” sensation in and around the pelvic area. This relaxation will allow you to caress and massage your partner’s sacred spot more deeply and pleasurably. You will become aware of and sensitive to tension areas and pleasure spots, and such reading of your partner’s responses will allow additional pleasure from increased stimulation. One of the indications that your partner, the receiver, may give is when he starts meeting your penetration to deepen it or he will start rocking his hips, meeting and seducing the caressing finger.

Stimulating the sacred spot is a technique unto itself but can be used during lingam massage for an added boost of pleasure and to enhance your partners orgasm(s).

Including deep abdominal breathing work during the extended genital and prostate massage will relax your partner body and greatly enhance the over-all experience. Breath-work is what, ultimately, brings forth a whole body orgasmic experience. As a person begins to recognize the chronic tension and holding patterns held within the body, a higher level of awareness will also develop. With intention and touch the body can begin to “re-wire” its nervous system and find a natural rhythm and frequency.

In general, we will practice a breathing technique that is deep, rhythmic, and focused. The masseur will assist in this breathing practice and guide the receiver. One essential focus will be on the urethral and anal sphincter muscles and application of the general rule: on inspiration contract the sphincters and on expiration relax them.

Preparations

  1. Create an ambiance of relaxation and eliminate any interruptions.

Before starting any session, make certain that you have all of the necessary materials and paraphernalia prepped and placed conveniently within reach. The type of session and your personal preferences will dictate what you’ll need but the basics will include: Lube an massage oils, towels and tissues, a set of feathers, a very soft make-up brush, several candles or tea lights, a sound system with appropriate chants or background music, mats, pillows or cushions, a large sitting cushion.

Have all of your oils and fragrances, flavors (blow, touch, taste, kiss ritual) within comfortable reach.

You might want to have a temple bell or a small gong nearby to signal transitions and to redirect attention.

Ensure that the room is darkened and that the room temperature is set to provide a comfortable temperature for being naked. Ensure that all possibility of interruption by noise, animals, and people is minimized.

  1. Set the tone of trust and intimacy.

After exchanging intimate embraces, gently guide the recipient to his knees and support him as you bring him gently and lovingly onto his back. Position his arms at his sides palms up. Gently position his legs in the extended position, slightly parted, and his knees slightly raised. so that you can comfortably fit your knees between them. I would suggest rolling up a towel and placing it under his neck. In this position, you will have easy access to his penis, the perineum, and his anus; you will be massaging all of these areas during the ritual.

Take a position to his side, and seated on a cushion, take a small drum or clapper sticks, and set a rhythm for your mutual breathing.

Breathing is important. It should be slow, deep and rhythmic. On inspiration, you both should tense your anal and urethral sphincters, on the expiration relax the sphincters. Remind him to breathe deeply and attempt to keep your breathing rhythm. You may want to use a small drum or sticks to set a breathing rhythm.

The Tantric gaze is a very important part of our homoerotic ritual. Gaze into your partner’s eyes, enter him through his eyes. Hold the gaze and if it is broken at times by the massage ritual, return to it. Gaze upon your parter’s beautiful body and describe it in loving terms to him.

Read the mystic love poetry of Hafiz or Rumi, commit some of the beautiful verses to memory and recite them softly while reverencing your lover’s body.

Always be in contact with your lover’s body at some point, even if you have to reach for an oil or a fragrance or a flavor. Never break the connection or the energy flow during the ritual.

3.      Give special attention to the rates and patterns of breathing.

Deep, regular, synchronized breathing is a characteristic of homoerotic tantric ritual and controlled breathing is what makes Tantra so different from routine, mechanical sex. In Tantra, we practice the concept of “bliss breath.” This means that during the body massage ritual, lingam or prostate massage ritual, you should remember to breathe in such a way as to receive your partner’s energy of arousal and pleasure on the inhale and send him loving energy on the exhale.

When you conceive of your breathing in terms of “bliss breath” during the homoerotic ritual, you and your partner will

  • Experience a deeper feeling of worship, enhanced meditation and mindfulness, and a greater feeling of love for your partner;
  • You will have a heightened sensitivity to and you will become empathetic to his perceptions and responses, and his sensations and emotions.
  • Your sexual intuition will be enhanced and you will be more attuned to and aware of what your partner finds most pleasurable by responding to such things as his breathing, his vocalization, and his physical responses to your gifts of attention and service.

4.      Assist your partner in his breathing depth and rhythm.

Even before the homoerotic tantric session, during the initial intimacies, you and your partner should tune into each other by practicing bliss breath together. You can practice this by taking a few breaths together in synchrony. Deep rhythmic breathing in harmony and synchrony with your partner will calm you both, will bring you biospiritual rhythms into sync, and will have beneficial effects on your heart rate and blood pressure. During the meditations and during the massage rituals, gently and softly encourage your partner to breathe deeply, relax, let go, release, and receive all of the energy flowing between you.

5.      Oils and lube are essentials.

Touch is an essential mode of transmission of the spiritual energies during these rituals. Touch is actually a continuum of connected points, and the smoother the better. If the skin or the hands are dry, there will be a sensation of catching and pulling, similar to microvelcro, and the sensation created will be distracting and unpleasant. Lubrication allows touch to be gentle gliding, seamlessly connecting the infinite number of points into one unique pattern; it is that pattern that will create the pleasure, joy and love you are co-creating with your partner.

The Massage Ritual

Since lingam massage is such an important ritual in our homoerotic practice, we’ll focus on that ritual in the method below.

First of all, generously lubricate and gently massage around the penis.

In general, I recommend the use of high quality massage oils scented with aromatherapeutic essential oils like [jasmine, ylang ylang, bergamont, sandalwood, ginger, etc.]. Because the area around the penis, perineum and anus are so rich in nerves and the tissues are delicate, I recommend using a very mild oil like coconut oil or almond oil as your base, which have a very pleasant fragrance and flavor. Use the oil to lubricate the shaft of the penis and the scrotum, passing down the perineum to the area around the anus, then navigate back to the scrotum, massaging the sack and your partners balls.

Don’t go straight for the penis but start your gifts by running your hands up and down his inner thighs before slowly moving up to his crotch. The inner thighs are one of the male erogenous zones, and massaging the inner thigh will pleasure him while at the same time relaxing him.

Gently whisper instructions, compliments, or loving words while you are massaging him. Let him become aware of your breathing and soft vocalizations while you are attending to him.

Move onto the testicles. Gently, slowly massage them. The scrotum is very sensitive and running your fingernails gently on his scrotum can be very pleasurable. Cup his scrotum and balls in your one hand and gently pull on them. At some point here you can cup his balls in your hands and fondle them by rolling them on the palms of your hands.

The general area of attention in lingam massage includes all of the area around his balls and penis, from the pubic bone in front to his inner thighs, and his perineum (which is the area between his balls and his anus) to around his anus, but the focus is the penis and during lingam massage, always have at least one hand on your partner’s cock.

Caution: As you know, a man’s balls can be very sensitive and some guys may be uncomfortable with someone massaging them. Apply different strokes, pressures, touching and pay attention to your partner’s reactions; he’ll give you cues like accelerated breathing, holding his breath, vocalizations, hand and arm gestures. If your partner is showing signs of sensitivity or ticklishness, change your pattern. Sometimes just reassuring him will relax him. You can talk about what you’ll be doing before you start the session, and you can ask him how he likes his cock and balls touched, or you can ask for feedback as you start fondling them.

Start by massaging the shaft of the penis.

All of the above ritual was basically prepping or teasing your partner into wanting more of your gifts. When you note that he’s ready for more intense attention, you can now move to the shaft of his now hard penis. It is important not to lapse into a mechanical routine. Vary the pressures you apply and the strokes both in direction and in speed. You can even intermittently alternate your grip from tighter to looser, and even pulsate your grip in one place or as you move along the shaft of his penis. You should use stroke variations by using a straight up stroke from the base to the head, a downward stroke from the head to the base, as well as a twisting motion in one direction or in both directions using both hands.

Thus you can change the action from using one hand to using two hands. To avoid fatigue and to provide some variation in the sensations provide d to your partner, alternate your single-hand technique between using the right hand and using the left hand.

The speed of your movements will produce different pleasure sensations so alternate the speed from slow to fast. You can start slowly and build up to a faster pace, then take it back to a slow speed again; alternatively you can start with a rapid stroke and progress to a slower more resolute rate. All the while you are alternating the pressure, speed, rhythm, and methods.

Alternate your shaft strokes to start from the root of the shaft all the way up to the head. Once at the head, you can either continue the straight up and down motion, or you perform a twisting movement—going from the root of the shaft and stopping just below the tip of the penis.

Variety and alternation are key to avoiding mechanical and boring strokes, as well as avoiding any irritation caused by overworking one area.

Here are some examples of two-hand technique:

  • Using both hands, grasp the penis with the fingers of both hands pointing in the same direction.
  • With the one hand holding the penis with the fingers pointing in one direction, place the other hand around the penis with the fingers pointing in the other direction.
  • In the two techniques above, both hands will move up and down at the same time. Ensure that you are using enough lube or oil so that your movements and strokes create a smoother, gliding motion.
  • In another technique, you will move your bottom hand (the hand closest to the base of the penis) up and down while the other hand performs a twisting or a swirling movement while gently grasping the head of the penis.
  • ·It is important that your partner does not ejaculate. He should not cum at any point in lingam massage. Practice cum control or “edging” to prevent ejaculation. The longer you can keep him from orgasm or cumming, the more cosmic the ultimate experience will be.

Your partner may be at a point now where he is begging to cum; he’ll be so aroused that he’s on the edge of finishing. By paying close attention to and staying aware of his responses like his breathing, vocalizations, and body movements, those cues will tell you how close he is to orgasm and cumming.

As soon as you become aware that he’s on the edge, at the point of orgasm and cumming, or if he tells you he’s almost there, take a break in the technique, or just slow it down, and remind him to breathe deeply and slowly, and surf the wave of pre-orgasmic feelings he’s experiencing.

It is completely normal if your partner goes from being rigidly hard to semi-hard or even soft during the ritual. This is actually supposed to happen. I would recommend that you talk about this before the session to avoid his becoming stressed or embarrassed that he lost his erection. This will happen several times during the session and it’s good to know and to expect it to happen.

At an appropriate point in the penis massage, move to the “sacred spot”, the P-spot, and massage the sacred spot externally.

The “sacred spot”or P-spot is the prostate, a walnut-size gland located between the bladder and the penis. When the prostate is massaged it can very pleasurable for your partner.

You can massage the prostate either externally or internally. You approach the prostate internally by inserting one or two lubed fingers into your partner’s lubed anus. Alternatively, instead of your finger(s), you can use a special sex toy specifically designed for prostate massage. External prostate massage is done by locating the small bump between your partner’s balls and his anus, and massaging the prostate without penetration.

External prostate massage may be advisable if your partner has never had internal stimulation of the P-spot. Locate the sacred spot, by identifying a small between the testicles and the anus; it can vary in size from a large pea to a walnut. Start the massage by pushing gently inward, urging pressure on the sacred spot. Proceed slowly and gently; let your partner guide you in terms of pressure and pleasure.

Once you have found the sacred spot and have decided on a pleasurable pressure, massage the spot by applying pressure with your fingers or even your knuckles. Back off and repeat the pressure. You can also apply a circular massaging pressure. Some men tend to be hairy in this area even if they’re smooth or manscaped over the rest of their body; ensuring good lubrication in hairy areas will help you to achieve the desired sensations.

If your partner is one of the hairy ones, you’ll have to use more oil to massage the area. I would recommend shaving the area, itself a very arousing experience, so that you can access and massage the area more pleasurably.

The most effective technique for massaging the sacred spot is to stimulate it internally.

If you’ve started with external prostate massage, ask your partner for permission to proceed to the next level of intensity with an internal massage. If he’s ready, relax and prepare his anus with massage oil or lube. Start by massaging the area around his anus with your fingers in a slow, smooth, and gentle circular motion. Do not attempt to penetrate into the anus yet, even with one finger. Ask your partner’s permission or ask if he’s ready for you to insert a finger. Don’t stress him; just ask him if he’s ready for more intense attention.

If your partner wants penetration, prepare him for insertion by ensuring that both his anus and your fingers are well lubed or oiled up. As I have stated in my remarks elsewhere on preparation, make certain that your finger nails are trimmed down and all jagged edges are filed down smooth. The tissues around and inside the anus are delicate and you don’t want to injure or traumatize them.

Start by slowly and gently inserting the tip of one finger, don’t penetrate any deeper into your partner than up to the first finger joint. Make little wiggling and back-and-forth movements to relax him, let him adjust to the sensations, and to allow his sphincters adjust. When your partner is comfortable with this prepping, ask him for permission to proceed with inserting your finger(s) more deeply. You’ll need to insert your finger or fingers up to or just beyond the second finger joint, because the prostate is 2 to 3 inches inside the anus, and towards the front, towards the belly button.

You’ll be able to identify the prostate because it is about the size of a walnut and similar in shape. Once you have located it, caress it by massaging it with your finger(s), moving from side to side, up and down. Massaging the prostate is referred to as “milking” it using a beckoning motion of with your finger(s). It’s important to ask your partner how your massaging feels and ensuring he’s comfortable and enjoying the attention. It’s very important that you let him guide what you are doing.

Prostate massage can sometimes be difficult to do using the fingers because fingers vary in length and in stamina; your finger may not be able to get the range of movement or can get fatigued. If this is the case, purchase a sex toy designed specifically for prostate massage, and take it to the next level.

How to bring the massage to a finish.

There are two general ways to finish the massage session: you can stimulate your partner to climax with a final orgasm and ejaculation, or you can move into a next stage of homoerotic tantric ritual and proceeding to intercourse.

If your partner is practicing semen retention, you can have him hold all his cum as he learns to channel all of the energy of genital orgasm from his genitals into whole body energy orgasm.

Epilogue

When I describe homoerotic tantric sex to men, their initial reaction is “Sex for hours? No way!” The practice of tantric sex is not to have marathon sex sessions (though that is achievable and not a bad idea). The principle of homoerotic tantric sex to experience stronger, deeper, and more intimate connection with your partner. Such intimacy can certainly translate into exotic sex for hours and mind-blowing orgasms, but that will come in its own time, and you shouldn’t start off with such lofty goals that require patience, practice, discipline, and a very trusting partner.

Tantra principles not only help people have better sex but are also a powerful tool to release unhealthy emotions and trauma that block relationships.

Tantra is instrumental in healing because in this practice sex is sacred. It is not taboo. It is not something to be ashamed of. It gives the partners permission to integrate themselves as sexual men and own that energy as an empowered divinities. Just viewing sex as worship instead of something profane or simply biological is incredibly liberating for men practicing homoerotic tantra.

For simplicity, we can adopt the acronym KISSES to describe the essence of our Tantric engagement:

  • K-Kinetic: Tantra is about tapping into and embracing our inherent sexual energy.
  • I-Intimacy: Tantra principles create deeper intimacy and make a true “heart connection” through mindful sex.
  • S-Slow Down: By slowing down the foreplay, full body, penis, prostate massage, anal intercourse, and the finish, followed by intimacy you better able to be fully present and more aware and attentive to the ritual, cues and responses given by your partner, and aware of your own and your partner’s needs.
  • S-Sensuality: Establishing a sensual rapport before initiating the sexual ritual and techniques will ensure that you are participating in the session with your whole mind, body, and spirit and will harmonize you with your own body and allow you to be aware of and to respond to your partner’s body cues.
  • E-Emotions: You will ride a wave of emotions once you learn to beceome self-aware and you achieve self-knowledge; you will then practice self-forgetfulness and stillness. With the ego’s defenses broken, you will not have to deal with all the distracting barrier emotions and will be able to enjoy the enlightened emotions of Compassion, Love, Joy.
  • S-Spirituality: Tantra is an ancient spiritual practice. True Tantra is spiritual and far from being the perverted, hijacked physical practice focused only on sexual gratification and a pseudo-spirituality, the whole Westernized concept having been commandeered by the feminist movement, which totally kidnapped and misinterpreted the Shakti (the feminine principle; the primordial cosmic energy, the dynamic forces that move through the entire universe). Tantra is inasmuch feminine only because it is metaphoric as a complementarity to the Shiva masculine principle, and degraded to a gendered sociopolitical practice. Because we are embodied creatures Tantra has provided a means of incorporating our physical bodies into the rituals, whose ultimate destination is unity with the Divine, an almost universal destination for all mainstream spirititual and belief Traditions. Tantra, like yoga, must not become fragmented into profane fractional practices; Tantra, like yoga, is an integral system and Spirituality is its core and destination.

With that mission in mind, here are my five tips on how to incorporate tantric sex into your sex life:

Leave the ego at the door; be trusting, accept vulnerability, surrender to your partner, avoid judgment.

Tantra is no place to bring in your baggage accumulated from your conventional, profane sex experiences, whether they are good, bad or mediocre. Conventional, profane sex is a head game, in which we have myths, narratives, stories that we tend to apply to ourselves and to our partners; sex becomes a template in which you fill in the blanks with what you are expected to do. It becomes an egistic competitive performance game in which we judge our own body and our partner’s body; we evaluate our performance in self-pleasure and pleasuring of our partner; we have an O-ideal in terms of what orgasm should be and when it should happen. We have an incredible, sometimes debilitating anxiety about trying something new or unusual or kinky; we tend to avoid creativity or when we do it’s veiled in a façade of control. The key to our homoerotic tantric session is enter a non-judgmental, safe and sacred space, in which we have unconditional trust, submit to vulnerability, and surrender to our partner. We become self-forgetful and have no agenda — we simply surrender to the moment however long that moment will be. There’s no script.

Bliss breath is a tantra technique that makes you feel much closer to your partner, and enhances the depth of the Tantra interactions. We use a technique called bliss breath, in which you slightly constrict the back of your throat and take long, slow, deep breaths through your nose. You’ll make an unusual sound when you are doing it correctly. You will inhale and exhale in sync with your partner and in sync with the speed and rhythm of your actions, sometimes fast, and then slowing down to ride the edge of climax longer. Being in sync with our breathing will bring us into an almost trance state.

Make eye contact with your partner.

Tantric intimacy is far more than being naked with a partner and engaging in sexual interactions. We are all aware that in conventional profane sex partners can avoid true intimacy and sometimes are so wrapped up in their own experience as to be unaware of what’s going on with their partner.

We access the soul through the eyes; we feast on the vision of the beloved. We enter into their inmost being through the portals of the eyes. Make and maintain eye contact during foreplay and during sex for as long as possible. Be intense. Enter your partner through every gate. We are not accustomed to eye contact and it will feel awkward, you might feel self-conscious or embarrassed. But you must and will overcome these obstacles, and you will realize how important eye contact is to the total experience.

Concentrated eye contact the tantric session, especially when engaging in the sex and massage rituals, allows you to enter deep into the other person and allows your partner to enter deep inside you. Closed eyes during intimacy is a barrier to our purpose of entering into unity with our partner. Closing the eyes focuses the attention on our own experience or fantasies, rather than sharing with our partner. Closing the eyes may be an indication of shame or lack of trust; a fear of that deep spiritual connection. Eye contact helps you be fully connected to your own sensations and to your partner’s responses and cues.

Eye contact and feasting on your partner’s physical presence is one important way of involving the highly developed and sophisticated sense of sight in our tantric experience.

Try feather-light touching.

The sense of touch is ever present and of indispensable importance in the homoerotic tantric session. Without touch it would be almost impossible for the unenlightened practitioner or disciple to experience the many benefits of Tantra.

We can touch gently as with a kiss or light finger touching or forcefully as in some massage techniques. We have stimulating touch techniques in prostate and penis massage. You can run your fingernails gently up and down his arms, his back, his neck, etc. to produce a sensuous stimulating effect.

We also use techniques for caressing your partner with a feather-light touch or we use a very soft brush as one form of foreplay and stimulation in Tantra. The skin is a powerful and sensitive organ. This is an important technique for teasing your partner and delaying gratification; this aids in the build-up of sexual tension and energy, and increase arousal.

Such erotic tactile stimulation techniques also have a psychological effect in that they raise the level of anticipation in your partner, and increases levels of the neurotransmitter dopamine in his body. In tantra, foreplay is not about leading into hot, rough, raw sex. In Tantra, foreplay is preparatory ritual and it should be gentle, sensual, and loving while still arousing, energizing, and titillating your partner and yourself..

Practice yab-yum.

Yab-yum is a icon or symbol in the Buddhist art of India, Bhutan, Nepal, and Tibet. It represents the primordial union of wisdom and compassion, depicted as a male deity in union with his female consort. It is a Tibetan expression that translates literally to “father-mother” and is symbolized as two deities in a seated position with the feminine factor seated on the lap of the masculine factor, straddling him with her legs wrapped around him. To get in position, start by sitting up straight, cross-legged in front of each other and look into each other’s eyes.

The classic Tantra yab-yum embrace.

Your intimate connection is established by sitting quietly, motionless, maintaining mutual eye contact, and breathing in synchrony. In this stage of homoerotic tantric engagement there is no genital touching; you will use light, feather-like touching to caress each othre. The second position or yab-yum the one partner brings his knees over the other partner’s legs. In the third position, he straddles his partner and wraps his legs around him—chest-to-chest, heart-to-heart, and genitals-to-genitals. This position may be assumed later in the session when the one partner in the feminine diety position receives the masculine diety’s penis inserted into the anus and in this position rocks to-and-fro, up and down in a stimulating, massaging dance.

Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, a licensed sex and relationship therapist who has studied oxytocin, says, “Oxytocin is a powerful hormone. With the 20-second hug—chest-to-chest—you will feel a rush.” Can you imagine what you will feel with 15 minutes of yab-yum?

In this way the partners acting out the roles of the masculine and feminine dieties are prolonging anal intercourse and prostate massage by the masculine deity’s penis, in order to augment arousal , and build up energy and tension. I recommend that couples try this position for at least five minutes in the beginning and build up to 10 or 15 minutes.

The Tantric yam-yab position allows total access to the partner’s energy points.

Click on this link to download a pdf version of this article: Lingam Massage.

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Prostate Massage: Basics of Massaging the Male Sacred Spot

A big part of sacred sexuality is learning to love and worship the penis, the lingam, not simply as a pleasure tool, but worshipping it as a sacred wand of light and creation. The penis or the lingam has since time immemorial been revered as a powerful symbol of masculine energy, power and creative potential. A specific article is available on lingam massage on this blog at [to be published].

While for most men the penis is the focus of their sexuality and truly is the locus of the most concentrated masculine enegy, lingam massage is but a sub-ritual of a total homoerotic Tantra session, and optimally should be included with a method of achieving multiple erotospiritual cosmic orgasm, massage of the so-called “sacred spot”, the P-spot, or prostate massage, the locus of the second chakra.

Massaging the Male Sacred Spot


Homoerotic Tantra is an erotospiritual practice and involves the triad of mind, body and spirit. In order to derive the whole range of benefits from the practices and rituals, you must suspend any form of judgement, you must trust your partner completely, you must be willing to be authentic (genuine and truthful), self-forgetful (leave the ego at the door). You must be willing to surrender to your partner, and accept your responses and reactions with abandonment and freedom. In our homoerotic Tantra session we will join other esoteric traditions of erotospiritual practices that are conceived to overcome the separation of sacred (spiritual) and profane (physical sexual) love.


For most men the thought of prostate massage produces an uncomfortable reaction of curiosity and dread. But such a reaction is artifactual, and is at its origin a trust issue that must be overcome before any man can fully enjoy the benefits of homoerotic Tantra and massage as part of your erotospiritual engagement. Overcoming judgement and trust issues is one big reason why you should make prostate massage an integral part of your sexual practices; it then will become highly desirable in your erotic life and will become an enhancement of your erotic performance as well as you masculine self-esteem.

Prostate massage has been used in many traditions throughout history as a way to enhance a man’s sexual pleasure. Prostate massage is described explicitly in only a few traditions, however, and the technique described is what we call the digital massage of the prostate, either externally or internally. When prostate massage is done to enhance orgasm and produce ejaculation, we refer to it as “prostate milking.”

One of the pleasurable effects of anal intercourse is that when the penis is enters the anus the prostate is stimulated, and the ensuing thrusting motion is actually massage stimulation of the prostate. This is one of the reasons why the recipient partner’s orgasm and ejaculation during anal sex is so intense and full.

The Tantric yam-yab position allows total access to the partner’s energy points.

Prostate massage is now recognized to be beneficial therapy in men who are living with common prostate disorders as well as in its role in enhancing orgasm (more intense and multiple orgasms), promoting ejaculation (in cases of delayed ejaculation) and erectile function (as in erectile dysfunction or ED).[1]

How to do prostate massage manually[2]

Internal Prostate Massage Technique.

There are two ways you can perform prostate massage: externally or internally. There are two ways to do external or internal prostate massage: digitally or using a prostate massage too. There are two types of prostate massage tool: manual and electronic. Quite frankly, which method you use is immaterial; it’s the experience that counts. Not only does prostate massage provide a unique and intense pleasure experience, it can increase blood flow in the anogenital area, improve urinary flow, and may even contribute to prostate health in general.

As in any erotic practice, but especially in homoerotic tantric practice, there is some preparation to be done before the real interaction starts. Hygiene and preventive practices must be taken seriously to avoid injury, possible infection, and to avoid possible embarrassment.


Getting Started

If you want to give this practice a try or want to add a little flair to your sex life, follow these steps to get started:

  1. Bodily cleanliness is a must. Shower before any session making certain to give attention to the genitals and the anus. If you are uncut, gently cleanse the head of the penis and behind the foreskin.
  2. There are some preparations that you can do to ensure that the rectum is empty and clean. First of all, a high fiber diet helps. Try to have a bowel movement before your shower. You will want to douche before the session to ensure that all material is out of the rectum. Make certain everything is springtime fresh in the business areas.
  3. If you are going to use the digital method it is very important that you trim and file your nails to ensure that there are no sharp edges and no burrs that that can injure the very delicate tissues. If you are going to use a glove, a finger cot, or a condom to massage the prostate, make certain you are not using a silicone-based lube.
  4. Assume one of the positions described below or have your partner get into one of the positions. This may happen automatically as you move through a tantric session and change positions, so you can play it by ear. If you find either of you are in a good position for prostate massage, go for it.
  5. Generally, don’t break the flow and spontaneity of the session by distracting procedures like putting on a glove or similar, if you can manage to discretely put on a condom on the finger or fingers, fine, otherwise you can go skin-to-skin.
  6. Place oil based lubricant on your index finger or your index and middle finger, and lube the anus and the external sphincter anus. Of course, you can use special toys instead of your fingers, but I prefer skin-to-skin finger work.
  7. Trust is absolutely essential when performing this technique; if you and your partner don’t completely trust one another, it’s not going to work. You can try your best to be relaxed but if you don’t trust your partner, you won’t be able to be completely vulnerable and surrender to his ministrations. It may be helpful to engage in gentle ass play or even rimming before the massage; this helps to relax both of you.
  8. Always communicate with your partner. Ask if he’s ready to have you insert your finger tip for the prepping phase of the massage.
  9. Gently, tentatively and slowly Insert index finger into the anus past the external sphincter, wait a second or two, and then go in past the internal sphincter, pause, and then proceed into the rectum. I repeat: do this slowly and gently. There’s no rush and if you do it clumsily you’ll kill the moment dead as a stone.
  10. Again, communicate with your partner, and ask if he’s ready to have you insert your finger(s) to explore and massage his sacred spot. Ensure that both your finger and your partner’s anus are generously lubed or oiled. This is very important.
  11. A good insertion is to penetrate about 2–3 inches in — that’s up to about your second finger joint — and pause, allowing your partner to relax before proceeding. This will allow him to adjust his position for maximum pleasure. Usually if he brings his legs up to his chest or onto your shoulders, penetration will be improved and pleasure increased. (about your second knuckle)
  12. Move the tip(s) of your inserted finger(s) upwards towards your partner’s belly button (navel), and hold for a second or two.
  13. Now, using your inserted finger(s) gently explore until you detect a roundish walnut sized mass of tissue just in back of the penis and in the wall of the rectum – You’ve found the prostate gland; this is your partner’s sacred spot.

You’re ready to begin:

  1. If you’re in the right place, your partner will react and indicate that he’s feeling a different sensation, which he may describe as strange and/or pleasurable. It’s important to note his breathing pattern and his vocalizations. His body will tell you if you’re pleasuring him.
  2. As soon as your partner is fully relaxed and you feel a release of tension on your inserted fingers, you can start moving around the prostate. Gently massage the area all around the prostate with your fingerpad, applying gentle but firm pressure, concentrating on tracing around the sacred spot (try to avoid the middle portion). The pleasure effects produced depend on the pressure applied, the speed of your massaging movements, and type of movement and these vary from individual to individual. You’ll have to go slowly and read the feedback.
  3. There is no rush so do every action slowly, gently, responsively, paying close attention to your partner’s breathing and the sounds he is making; don’t go for the penis yet, and you may even want to avoid touching his penis in order to produce the most intense prostate orgasm.
  4. You can experiment with bringing your partner to multiple prostate orgasms (P-orgasms) as possible before you decide to move on in the session or to begin milking the prostate or orally stimulating him while massaging his prostate, or you can masturbate him or he can do himself to experience very intense ejaculation. How you want to handle the ejaculation depends on you but it’s always useful to have a towel nearby.
  5. If you bring your partner to ejaculation by massaging his prostate this is what we call “milking” the prostate. After one or several P-orgasms the ejaculation is likely to be very intense, forceful and voluminous.
  6. Add more lube if you feel it would help your movements or enhance your partner’s pleasure and comfort.
  7. If there is any pain or any indication of trauma or bleeding STOP IMMEDIATELY.

Notes:
  • During the prepping massage or foreplay, you may want to bring your partner to a full erection. This will increase his pleasure.
  • Use a lot of oil-based lube on your fingers, the perineum, around and in the anus. and on your partner’s penis. This is very important to ensure smooth and silky massage and to avoid any friction or discomfort, which will be distracting and can kill the moment.
  • Whether performing the massage ritual solo or with a partner, the best position is to lay down on your mat or on a bed (on your back, with the hips raised slightly on a pillow or cushion, heels close to the buttocks and the knees up). This positioning makes the areas of focus more accessible.
  • Always communicate with your partner in soft, gentle, encouraging tones. Be aware of his responses. Always ask permission before entering his sacred sanctuary. Slow down or pause as soon as you detect any tension around your fingers or if your partner is showing any signs of discomfort.

P-Orgasm

P-orgasm (prostate orgasm) is an orgasm produced by massaging the prostate. Achieving a P-Orgasm by internal prostate massage is not quantum physics, but you will need  a little practice with the particular partner; every man will respond differently. You have to find the best position for receiver and easy, comfortable, pleasurable access to the entire area is vital, so it is important to discuss possible positions and to agree on a position that will be the most comfortable for you and your partner. During a tantric session, you will be changing positions so you can play this by ear; if your partner is responding, you’ll both know when he’s ready.

Comfortable anal penetration

The following positions are probably the best ones for men and allow comfortable anal penetration and access to the prostate via the rectum:

  • Place your partner on his hands and knees (or you assume this position), legs slightly apart.
  • You can bend your partner over a table, a chair or the side of the bed.
  • Laying on his (your) side on the bed, a mat, the floor, the upper leg extended slightly forward but bent. This one works well when soloing.
  • Lying flat on his/your back with his/your knees up and on your/his shoulders.
  • Lying flat on his/your back with his/your knees up and his/your feet flat, knees pointing up.
  • Squatting, facing one another (this can be a bit awkward but allows deeper penetration).
  • Seated facing one another, your partner seated on your thighs, his legs and arms wrapped around you (this allows deep penetration and is a classic for anal intercourse). This is called the Tantric yab-yum position and is iconic of the masuline and feminine principles, Shiva-Shakti, in cosmic co-creative embrace.
The classic Tantra yab-yum embrace.

Note: If your partner is having a hard time relaxing and enjoying the experience, you may have to adjust your technique — you may be too forceful, too hurried, not using enough lube, or just not giving him permission to guide your actions — try this:

  • Ensure that your finger(s) and the area around and in the anus are well lubricated.
  • Insert your lubricated finger into the anus and gently probe for the prostate. The prostate feels like a small walnut. Pause, allow your partner to relax.
  • Once the prostate has been located, apply light pressure for several seconds using your finger pad(s), and then release the pressure. Note his responses.
  • Ask his permission to go deeper with your finger.
  • Advance the finger again and apply gentle pressure on the same or a different spot if you can. Hold for several seconds and then release. Note: If you apply pressure to the center or middle portion of the prostate, you may note that there is a release of clear fluid (precum) at the tip of the penis.
  • Repeat this massage method five to ten times, always noting your partner’s responses. It’s very likely he will have a strong erection, which is normal, and a clear fluid (precum) might appear at the tip of his penis, again this is normal depending on how you are massaging. But, for now, concentrate on the prostate not on the erection.

The external massage is to apply gentle pressure with a finger along the perineum, the area located between the scrotum and anus. Use some lube so that your finger glides easily along this sensitive area, and massage the entire perineum for several minutes. Find a slight bulge approximately midway between the scrotum and the anus and gently massage it using one, two or three lubed fingers. This is the external massage of the prostate.

How to do prostate massage with a massage device

If you are into adventure and variety, you may want to try using a prostate massage tool or an electronic massage device. There is a huge variety of models of both from which to choose both for internal and external prostate massage. Whether you use a tool or an electronic device use one designed only for prostate massage, and not one considered a “toy” or for multiple uses. If you use a tool or device, please study to product information carefully and know how to use it correctly. Study what’s offered on the market and carefully read reviews and other information about the products you are considering before you make your purchase and use it on yourself or your partner.

Several Examples of Prostate Massagers

If you purchase a prostate massager for internal massage, make certain you are using one specifically designed for internal use, that is, one that can be inserted into the anus and survive oil-based lube. The anal and rectal tissues are delicate tissues, so it is vitally important that you use a device that has been designed solely for this purpose.  You may find that you prefer a vibration effect and you can then consider  products that have a vibration feature. Any device for internal use must be well-lubricated before insertion and even while massaging. The vibration feature triggers when the device is pressed against the prostate, and may reduce inflammation, improve blood flow, and relax the gland.

An electronic prostate massager.

External prostate massage products are designed so you can sit on them, and may also applies pressure and/or vibration stimulation to the perineum and to the prostate externally.

The prostate is the male G-spot

The prostate is the male G-spot—which was named after the pioneering sexologist Ernst Gräfenberg—the male prostate gland can help produce intense orgasms and voluminous ejaculation. The male G-spot is located about two or three inches into the rectum, measuring from the anus.

The prostate also aids in the production of seminal fluid; all male orgasms start with the prostate.  The prostate has even more nerve endings than the penis and so it is a key to male erotic pleasure.

Of course, some men just can’t trust and surrender, so it will be difficult to convince them to allow internal prostate massage. That’s not a big problem because the prostate can be externally stimulated by applying pressure to the perineum—that no-man’s land between a man’s scrotum and, since nerve endings on the perineum are closely associated with nerve endings in the prostate, applying external stimulation and pressure the perineum will send him at least a couple of rungs higher up the ladder to pleasure paradise.

Many guys who rush into lovemaking with no preparation usually end up mixing feces in their lovemaking; I call this expecting fluffy merengue and getting chocolate mousse. So, I recommend very strongly that you ensure that you have evacuated as much as possible from your rectum prior to taking a shower, that you clean the area well, and about an hour before the session, use a rectal douche. I recommend that you douche with warm water only before your tantric session and possible prostate-massage.

I manscape and if you are a hairy man, plan to shave strategic areas; I do recommend manscaping. Manscaping means removal of excess or all hair on the body, especially in the target areas. Each area of the body has different sensitivities and characteristics so not all hair removal methods will be appropriate for all body areas. Shaving, waxing, depilatories, clipping, plucking, etc. can all be used but with caution.

Fingernails are especially important. Make certain that the nails are trimmed and all sharp edges and burrs are filed down. Always ensure that you sanitize before you eroticize. If you intend to use any sex toys or stimulation tools or devices, make certain that they are carefully cleaned and disinfected before and after the session.

Agree on a position or positions that will be comfortable and pleasurable for your partner and will allow you easy access and penetration into his anus and rectum. It’s usually tight and sensitive down there so my advice is to lube, Lube, and LUBE. Sorry guys, unlike a vagina, your male anus does not self-lubricate.  You need to find a lubricant specifically formulated for anal application and you should not be afraid to use plenty of it.

Then, when you’re in the shower, insert a soapy, well-manicured finger a few times until you’re feeling squeaky clean. This doubles as opportunity to grow accustomed to the feeling of having something inserted into your butt. At first, it’s probably going to feel like you’re going to have a bowel movement, but if you make it part of your showering regimen, you can create a new pleasurable association, quite distinct from a healthy BM.

Your partners will all be different in their responses. Some guys are going to really enjoy prostate massage right from the start. Some are going to be suspicious or even refuse to try it. Still more will react the same way that most people do when trying something adventurous: they’ll learn to enjoy it over time. Most guys who make it work for them agree that their orgasms are much more intense (and very different) than what they might experience from penile stimulation alone. Some say it’s more focused, and others compare it to energy waves flowing through a region of the body or even the entire body. It depends on the masseur’s technique and experience, whether external or internal, the pressure and motion of the massage, whether an instrument is used, and, obviously, the person receiving the massage.

Both the masseur and the receiver should understand that simply massaging the prostate for a few seconds will likely not produce orgasm, and some men may not orgasm every time, but with practice, the process has been shown to be a very effective way to achieve enhanced orgasm(s) and more voluminous cum.

This technique will cause intense sexual stimulation and arousal, and your partner will become highly aroused and responsive. Don’t be surprised if he starts moving his body in response to your insertions, urging you ever deeper into his sanctuary.

Your massaging will likely give him a raging hard-on. This is a natural response when these areas are stimulated. And we all know about spontaneous erections. Yes, a strong erection will be distracting and even tempting but it will subside shortly. Just stay focused on the massage for now.

You and your partner should also expect that he will go soft or even lose the erection spontaneously. This is completely normal and expected, and shouldn’t be a cause for concern or embarrassment. (You may want to discuss this point before starting the session, just to be sure he’s comfortable and not surprised when this happens.)

Reaching a P-Orgasm through internal stimulation is not very complicated, but it will require a little practice on your side. Before you begin, it is crucial to choose a position that will be the most comfortable for you.

Pay Attention:

  • Prostate milking should never cause any pain; it should be pure pleasure.
  • Always trim your fingernails and file the edges smooth; use plenty of non-silicon lube, preferably natural botanical oils, or a non-allergenic synthetic lube to avoid skin irritation.
  • Always communicate with your partner. Ask permission before entering his sanctuary or advancing your finger(s) deeper into him.
  • Take your time, make slow and directed movements, be gentle, and be aware of, attentive to, and responsive to his responses.
  • Homoerotic Tantra is not a competition sport or a performance contest; leave that to the sexual amateurs. Homoerotic Tantra is a form of worship and a spiritual discipline. Your partner’s body is the sacred space, the place of worship. Keep this in mind at all times.
  • If soloing, do not touch your cock when internally milking your prostate to experience intense orgasm(s); do not allow your partner to fondle himself or to assist you in the massage. Tie him up if necessary. Blindfold him if he feels compelled to watch. (Bondage and blindfolding will be discussed as techniques in an upcoming essay.)

Internal Stimulation

More Tips:

  • Agree on and bring your partner to an appropriate position that is both comfortable for him and one that will allow you complete access to all areas of focus during the massage ritual.
  • Bring your partner to a full erection.
  • Use a plenty of natural botanical oil-based lube on your fingers/toys, cock, perineum, and anus.
  • If you have them, sex toys designed specifically for prostate massage or insertion into the anus can be used for technical variety or convenience, and can be used to bring your partner to orgasm and ejaculation.
  • When you want to finish with ejaculation, there will likely be a lot of cum. Depending on your practice you may receive your partner’s cum as a gift anally, as sacred food orally, or as holy anointing. You may want to have tissues or towels at hand to collect any extra.
  • Slow down, pause, or stop if you become aware of any tension in your partner or if he shows any signs of discomfort.

Signs You Are Reaching P-Orgasm

It’s only natural that the beginner will try to anticipate when he’s getting close to a prostate orgasm and in it doesn’t happen in just the way he expects it to happen, well something went wrong. What went wrong is that he fell into the trap of expectation. He started to want to control the session and he was so insecure and unprepped, he’s worried he’s doing it all wrong. The whole exercise is about relinquishing control and just getting carried by the flow. As soon as you start worrying about technique you lose the vision.

Here are some signs that you are getting closer to orgasm when receiving prostate massage:

  • Clear fluid will appear at the opening of your cock. This is pre-cum and it is a sign that the prostate massage is working.
  • You might feel the urge to pee. This is just a neurological effect of prostate massage and does not mean that you are going to piss yourself. So relax.
  • You might have spontaneous muscle contractions around the area of stimulation. The contractions might especially occur in the pelvic and thigh areas as well as legs.
  • You might have a feeling of heat or warmth in your pelvis and genitals; this is an indication that you are getting very close to orgasm.

These are just a couple of common signs but bear in mind that each one of us will respond differently. You many not experience all of these signs and you may not experience them in this order; on the other hand, you may experience other signs not mentioned here.

Please share your experiences with me either by e-mail to gay.karuna.guy@gmail.com or leave a comment on this blog.

Homoerotic Tantra is All About Adventure and Discovery

Because of our culture and our fear of our bodies and allowing ourselves to experience pure pleasure, most men avoid anything that is related to playing with (and penetrating) their anuses. The lurid misinformation is that if a man enjoys anything like anal penetration he has to be effeminate, and not a real man. There’s nothing more masculine than the prostate; it’s just as male as a cock. Only a man can experience a prostate orgasm, and P-orgasim is an event that is so unique that you simply cannot achieve it through conventional sex. As a male brought up in the Judeo-Christian tradition or any Western tradition, the suggestion of anal penetration and prostate massage may seem aberrant or perverse but in some of the oldest and long-established religious and secular traditions it is a widely practiced discipline; you may be hesitant at first but when you are relaxed with the technique and have experienced its benefits, you will wonder how you ever enjoyed sex without it.

You will have to surrender yourself to exploding floods of cum, feeling waves of pleasure energy pass through your body, abandoning control over your physical movements, and feelings of intense emotions like joy and love. These are just a few “ecstasies” you will experience when you have included prostate massage in your homoerotic Tantric sessions on a regular basis.

To download a pdf version of this article, please click this link: Prostate Massage.


Special acknowledgement  to  (click on the image to visit ErosExoticaGay) for some of the images and information included in this essay.


[1] Note: If you know or have reason to believe you have or may have any anal, rectal, genital, prostate or other health problems, it is important to consult with your healthcare provider before you practice prostate massage either solo or with a partner.

[2] Note: In this essay and in the links provided as complements to this essay, the terms P-spot, sacred spot, prostate, prostate gland are all used interchangeably.

 

It’s the Journey that Counts…Make it Last

Penetration and Transfiguration: Entering Your Partner’s Sacred Sanctuary.
How We Should Approach the Homoerotic Tantric Session.

Open Yourself to Infinite Horizons!

When we see the word “penetrate” we see a word that means control, a violence. Penetration is forced entry into a space; there’s nothing loving or gentle about it. It’s wrongfully associated with masculinity for no good reason. Penetration, control, violence, brutality has no place in erotic expression between two men.

As gay men, as men in general, we have to stop the stressful and unfair thinking that we have always to control something, always be rough and raw; there’s nothing “masculine” about any of that. In fact, the ideal of masculine beauty was one of proportion, evenness, smoothness, balance. Yes, I said masculine beauty. The male has always been worshipped as perfect, complete form. When we as gay men feel unfulfilled, or our self-esteem and feelings of worth are diminished by feminists, employers, even our institutions, the resulting anger causes some of us to want to dominate another man, or have to perform like an endurance Olympian we are on a slippery slope to missing any real pleasure or joy in our sex life!

“How big is your dick?” is a common Facebook question. My response is “Why? How big does it have to be?” After all, it’s not the size of the bone but how you bury it that counts. Nobody seems to know the answer to my “Why?” question. Did the asker have a particular size in mind, a particular length and girth? Like a shoe size? Rather than ask, “How big is your manhole?” I just let it go. In my articles on anal sex and prostate massage, dick size is irrelevant; unless you’re involved with a pervert who needs to have his asshole ripped and enjoys pain for some reason. I deal only in pleasure, love and joy, and leave the pain and trauma to the size queens and the pervs.

Low self-esteem, the inability to experience love and joy in sex, the need to dominate or to perform, leads some gay sex gurus to carelessly use the word “penetrate,” or worse still “active” or “passive” when referring to sex partners. Those are very poor choices to describe what should be a sharing, uniting experience for both partners. I would rather my readers start thinking of “entering your partner’s sanctuary” or “melting into your partner.” Your partner must be treated as a temple, somewhere you go to worship. You should start treating him as if he were something holy, sacred; because he is. When you touch him, touch him reverently and with tender respect just as you would a sacred vessel or a rare work of art. When you taste him taste him like sacramental wine and holy bread; savour him as you would a gourmet feast. When you enjoy his scents treat those fragrances like sweet incense, the bouquet of a fine wine, or a rare perfume. When you gaze upon him see him as light and color beneath the form of his body; enter his soul through his hungry eyes and feed it with your loving gaze. Listen to the magical music of life and his response to your presence for him by listening to his breathing, his vocalizations, his heartbeat. When you touch him and enter him allow your body and his body to feel his warmth, his wetness, his energy; surrender yourself to him. There’s ecstatic pleasure, joy, and a mystical experience if you approach him this way.

Enter His Sacred Sanctuary with Awe and Love.

When you enter your partner’s sanctuary, enter with reverence and a sense of awe, just as you would any holy place. Awe because what you are doing is in fact awesome: you are melting into another man’s body and he is wrapping his body around your lingam, your wand of life and light, you will slowly approach the mystery of oneness with him, and are transported beyond when you reach your mutual orgasms as one. You will fill him with a sacred gift, your cum, and he will devour your offering.

Prostate Massage Can Bring Your Partner to an Incredible Orgasm.

You insert you fingers and massage his prostate. With your mouth embracing and caressing his cock, you are worshipping it as a sacred object, you invite him to share with you his power to create new life, his cum. His cum, semen, when ejaculated, has to power to create new physical life. But with you he shares his power and co-creates new spiritual life. When he cums you accept his gift and swallow it because you want this food of creation, this gift of divinity to become a part of you. So you accept his holy gift, his gift of his power to create new life, and you make it a part of you. Giving and receiving thus are part of this homoerotic engagement in which you mutually give and receive, mutually enter and worship, mutually nourish and are nourished.

What are you thinking when all of this is happening? Nothing. Nothing at all. In fact, you should empty your mind and let the river of mysterious tantric energy carry you into the next moment. Unlike the planned mechanical performance competitions most men consider sex with another man, this encounter is totally unplanned once you engage your partner in the initial tantric embrace. You commit to being one and each guides the other in an unspoken language. There is nothing planned and no competition. It’s not a performance and there is no set goal. In fact, the whole practice is to delay getting to any one point; the point will come to you. It’s the journey that’s important, not the arrival. Sure, you’ll get to the destination, orgasm, and you’ll enjoy the fruits of that destination, ejaculation and receiving your partner’s cum, but you’re not thinking of that at any time during the session.

You and your partner are jointed together by the love energy that you share.

During the session you are where you are; you are in that moment an nowhere else. You are with your partner, as one, in that moment. You are in sync and you are two in unity. In fact, if you think in terms of the trinitarian notion of perichoresis or circumincession, you and your partner are actually three entities: you, your partner and the love energy that binds you. You are constantly, instantaneously changing positions: at one instant you are the giver, in another you are the receiver, and in yet another you are the energy uniting the giver and the receiver. You are constantly and fluidly exchanging places with your partner and the energy force uniting you with one another.

What happens when you experience orgasm? Most will answer, “I cum.” That’s not the answer. Orgasm is that neurospiritual breaking out when you self-forget and melt into your partner. Most men don’t experience this because they are simply using their partner to get to a certain point, a point they could just as well arrive at if they masturbated. But this homoerotic tantric interaction is by its very nature wholly and completely different.

Your Orgasms are a Cosmic Explosion.

Throughout the session you have not been thinking of yourself; you have been self-forgetful. When you are self-forgetful you are no longer the center of the universe. You are aware of yourself but in a very unique way unaware of yourself; you are mindful of the moment but not of the sequence of moments. You are mindful and aware of your partner but also unaware of him in a very special way. In other words, you and your partner are transported into a different time-space continuum; you are in a different dimension, if you prefer. Once you stop obsessing about performing and doing something and just being in the moment, you will flow in a mysterious energy flux from moment to moment in a sort of circular time, you are spiritually in a state of altered wakefulness. Transfiguring yourself in this way you are present for your partner and he for you in a totally different way. There is complete trust, no anxiety, acceptance of your vulnerability, surrender to your partner, a unique love and compassion fills you, you are aware of joy, and you become one with him. By becoming one with your partner you are no longer the old you; you and he, as one, are a new creation.

In this way you have now penetrated the barriers that society and ego constructed to prevent you from the ecstatic interaction of melting into another person, of becoming one. You have penetrated those barriers simply by becoming self-forgetful, surrendering to stillness, not “performing”, just being with another being being. The ego and society can’t deal with a being that refuses to subject himself to anxiety or comparing his performance to another’s. The ego and society can’t cope with a being that does not subject himself to the constraints imposed by society to control. The ego and society cannot control a being who exists outside the container called society and who doesn’t exist in sequential linear time but floats in circular time.

You and your partner are the vehicles that carry the very energy that will power you to oneness. You and your partner are like two alembics of mysterious potions that once mixed, create enlightenment and awareness which transfigure into Love and Joy. You and your lover are the alchemists that have found a way to change lead into gold; a way of taking a purely physical animal act, sex, and curating it into a mystical and magical transformation of two men. This is true evolution true spiritual growth. This is interaction with Love and Joy.

Cosmic Complementarity in Homoerotic Tantra

Just as in the desert, the male rains shed their moisture on the dry inert earth and life emerges from the inertness. So, too, the male element sheds its moisture on the dormant, barren female element and life emerges from the barrenness. Giving and receiving requires letting go and embracing.

As males we tend to embrace dualities like male and female, active and passive roles, which are in competition. That’s clearly wrong and a sign of dysfunction, because when engaging the true self, the soul, there is no gender competition; spirit has no gender. We, as Seekers, much view these roles as being complementary, they form a complete unit rather than two separate entities.

Our ancestors, both in the East and in the West, were quite familiar with the notion of complementarity, and accepted the capability of the male to engage both the “male” and the “female” roles not as opposing principles but as complementary principles; the ancients even made this capability “holy” and honored it as a nearness to the Cosmic. Only when we lost touch with the Cosmos did the complementaries lose their authority and gave way to the dualities, the systems of suppression and control, the notions of gender differences based on anatomy, males and females. That’s when the spiritual confusion and the psychological anxieties began. Not all men are strong enough to embrace the fundamentals of homoerotic Tantra.

Homoerotic Tantra requires physical and spiritual endurance, maturity, self-awareness and self-knowledge, acceptance of vulnerability, willingness to surrender and release, self-forgetfulness, mindfulness, discipline, a love of Truth, a thirst for enlightenment. Few men can handle such challenges plus the challenge of relinquishing control over others.

Self- awareness, self-knowledge, peace, smile; so goes one of our most powerful mantras. The cosmic experience of sharing complementarily with another male, and engaging the tantric melting into the other is a powerful experience, one that will distract your gaze from all that is outside the sacred embrace shared by you and your lover, and gently but fiercely redirect your spiritual gaze inward. To achieve this is a monumental effort in our contemporary cultures because it requires the male to shatter the confining mold into which he has been forced, and to emerge transformed. Compare this to the caterpillar who spends his caterpillar life constantly feeding like caterpillars do and then when he’s had enough of the compulsory feeding and consuming, he goes into seclusion and weave himself a coccoon into which he sequesters himself to meditate and to transform; he emerges as a butterfly, no longer earthbound, full of color and freedom, the very animal spirit guide that represents maleness, the liberated soul.

Generally speaking, the masculine principle is active; the feminine principle is passive. The masculine principle is filling; the feminine principle is receiving. The masculine principle actively fills the space of the feminine principle. The masculine principle (pursuing, capturing, entering, thrusting, filling), while the feminine principle is still, receiving, is entered, filled. The masculine is like a storm: energetic, fierce, awesome; the storm finishes in a torrent of moisture filling the receiving cistern of the feminine principle with life-giving wetness.

The female receives, contains and holds the male’s moisture until it is needed. This is not duality but a complementarity. If it were not for the male principle the female would remain dry, empty, barren, lifeless. If it were not for the female the male’s energy would be spent, his life-giving moisture would be wasted, co-creation would halt.

But, as I mentioned above, these two principles are not dualities, not separate entities, but two complementary parts of one unity. In other words, in our concept of homoerotic Tantra, both partners embody and interact as both male and female principles, each expressed in turn as the melting in engagement proceeds; neither partner is in anyway in “control” or dominant in the interaction, it seems like that might be the case in the conventionally thinking mind but we are not only teaching a change in our concept of relationship but also a change in our way of thinking.

We no longer think of two men in erotic interaction as being role players, one playing the man the other the woman, an active role and a passive role. No! That is simply wrong, degrading, and deviant. Each of the male partners in homoerotic Tantra are constantly alternating from dynamic to static, giving to receiving, filling and emptying, light and dark in continuous reciprocation. How does this work? You might ask. It works because both partners are in spiritual consensus, that is, they spiritually agree to be vulnerable and to surrender to each other; they become self-forgetful in the sense that they no longer have the desire to control but simply to be. This being is a product of self-awareness and self- knowledge, which brings peace to the partners, and Truth. The partners, now that they have surrendered, can now respond purely to the rhythms and responses during the homoerotic Tantra session. Both are forgetful of themselves and the world and simply flow with one another.

The only guides and communications are the other’s responses: his breathing, his heartbeat, his body heat, his perspiration, his primal vocalizations, his sensory hungers and your nurturing responses. Just as the partners are alternating in their complementarities in the spiritual and emotional sphere, so too are the physical interactions complementary and reciprocal.

All of the senses are involved: The partners gaze upon and worship the physical manifestation of the other, the temple, the physical manifestation of the divine, and so the eyes are pleasured with the beholding of the other’s body.

Touch is elemental and closely allied with the sense of sight; touch produces a tactile image of the touched. One can close one’s eyes and simply touch and see the touched one. The touched one receives the energic impulses from his partner’s body and from the fingers, the hands, the lips, the tongue, the penis, the entire body at once, and responds with changes in his breathing, his heart rate, his body temperature, his movements, his vocalizations.

Smell is a powerfully erotic sense. During our session will fill the air with sweet, gentle, masculine aromas and fragrances. We use oils to allow our touch to be silky, smooth and erotic. The oils have the scent of lavender, bergamot, pine, cedar, and other precious essential oils. The fragrance of the male body, each of its parts having its own unique aroma and its aroma having its own unique erotic effects, acts on the perceiver.

Compare the effect of the sweet scent of your man’s neck with the powerful male musk of his underarms, to the sweet male scent of his buttocks and the savory scent of his cock and balls. Each area has a special scent and will elicit a unique erotic response from you as you savor it and its unique flavor.

 

Flavor a perception made possible by the primary organ of taste, the tongue. But the sense of taste works hand in hand with the sense of smell and each should be used to complement the other. Taste your lover gently behind the ears, his earlobes, his neck.

Move, breathing deeply and slowly while flicking the tongue gently over his chest, to his shoulders, armpits, his biceps, constantly inhaling his fragrances and savoring his flavors. Take his hand in yours and trace his fingers with your tongue, you exhalations cooling while your tongue provides heat.

Down his abdomen to his navel, a particularly sensation rich area to spend a few moments of mutual sensory pleasure, and then down to his pubic area. The only stimulation is with your tongue and your breath. (Ignore the penis for now; we will give it special attention later in the session.) Note how his balls retract in response to your licking and sniffing.

Now gently raise his legs so that his knees are in the air and his feet flat. Explore his perineum, the area between his scrotum and his anus, a particularly sensitive area where you can externally stimulate his prostate. Moving along this narrow passage, and your partner in this position, you can begin stimulating his anus, breathing in the sweet musky aroma it offers you.

Taking hold of one of your partner’s legs, gently leverage him onto his stomach in a smooth circular motion, never releasing contact with his body, and providing stability with your guidance. Now, on his stomach, he presents you with his buttocks and his anus, a heavenly playground for fingers, tongue and lips. His inner thighs are now begging for some attention and from there we will move back to the buttocks and the anus, for the ultimate experience of prostate massage and milking.

While gazing upon your lover, savoring his scent and tasting his flavors, you have never stopped touching him.

While the first three senses were applied, the fourth sense, touch, was constantly present, whether through the tongue or the fingers, or with entire body contact. Touch was constantly providing feedback and guidance, whether you sensed your lover’s movements, his breathing and heartbeat, or providing stimulation and pleasure.

Hearing is an important part of the erotic experience. On the one hand we provide background sounds like low, rhythmic music or chanting, which set a pace and a sacred ambience but do not distract from the melting into one another that is taking place. But our sense of hearing is very important in the erotic engagement of and response to the lover. We not only hear the smoothness of our hands moving over his oiled body, we also listen to his breathing pattern to guide us in our interaction. We listen for his wordless vocalizations and know when he is getting lost in the experience. We place our ear to his chest and listen to the music of his heartbeat, he is living Love.

Time and space has no meaning in this sacred encounter with the other. Ego and performance, competition and control have no place in this safe and sacred space. There are only two in this microcosmos: you and your lover. Nothing else exists.

You and he are Lord Shiva and Diva Shakti, divine complements, existing only as complements of singularity, of union. Shiva in his trinity of manifestations as creator, preserver, and destroyer, with his lingam (“shaft of light”) and his trishula (trident) representing the three gunas (attributes): sattva (goodness, constructive, harmonious), rajas (passion, active, confused), and tamas (darkness, destructive, chaotic), and his Shakti, Parvati, his complementary consort, who is inseparable from her masculine principle, the tantric Shiva. Parvati (Shakti) is the universal symbol of the power and recreativity of Lord Shiva; she is the subduer of demons and the guardian of harmony. Parvati (Shakti) is a female principle who has no beginning and no end; it is alternating between motion and rest, during which order is re-established. Parvati (Shakti) is also the source of a bond that connects all beings and a means of their spiritual release. Her symbol is the yoni, the place of silence, of gestation. The union of the yoni and lingam represents the eternal process of creation and regeneration, the union of male and female principles, and all existence.

Cosmic complementarity in masculine and feminine principles, principles of love, passion, activity, darkness, light, harmony and balance, is key to our homoerotic tantric practice.

Are you mature enough to accept the challenge? Are you willing to trust your lover enough to be vulnerable? To surrender? If you are such a Seeker? If so join us at Homoerotic Tantra here on Facebook. Join us and follow us on the Homoerotic Tantra blog on WordPress. Emerge as the liberated male spirit!

Om Kroom Lingaya Om
William a.k.a. “Gay Karuna

Gallery 1: Introducing Me in Images

 I’ve put together a slideshow that goes with my Relationship Résumé and the general topic of the Homoerotic Tantra blog.

Not all of the pictures are of me personally, but all of the pictures are accurate representations of me. It’s just that I don’t feel I have to reinvent the wheel to get my points across to my readers.

Coming up next: My next post will feature the five senses: sight, hearing,  taste, smell, and, most importantly, touch in our erotic sharing. I’ll post the link [here] when I’ve published it.

Well, that’s enough talking. Just enjoy the show and leave a comment, follow this blog, or contact me directly.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

shower1hearts
William a.k.a. Gay Karuna Guy gay.karuna.guy@gmail.com

 

The Tiger and the Butterfly Spirit Guides. Why my tattoos?

A totem animal is a spirit animal is and animal being, sacred symbol of a tribe, clan, family or individual. Tradition provides that each person is connected with up to nine different animals that will accompany him through life, acting as guides. Here’s a reflection on what I feel are my personal animal spirit guides.

“Tiger, tiger, burning bright in the forests of the night, what immortal hand or eye dare frame thy fearful symmetry?” [William Blake]

It’s not always apparent which animal totem is one’s principal spirit guide, and most people are generally unaware even of the animal symbol representing one’s spirit, soul, or true self. That was true for me, even though for years I had a special attraction for tigers and butterflies. I never thought Why? that was or even gave it a second thought, until I decided to get a tattoo. When I got my first tattoo I responded,  “A butterfly” when the artist asked me what I had in mind. My first tattoo was a very small but colorful butterfly, and over the years it faded, probably because I really didn’t take proper care of it.

Then, a couple of years ago, I noticed the guys in my gym sporting larger and multiple tattoos, and so I became interested in getting my old tattoo either removed or tattooed over with a more vibrant one. My first visit to the tattoo artist met with the same question after we discussed what to do with my old tattoo. “What do you have in mind?” My immediate answer was “I want a tiger and a butterfly, but together.” “Together? How together?” My answer sparked a surprised look on the artist’s face. “I want the tiger in the butterfly or the butterfly in the tiger, if possible both/and.” His response was, “Give me a week to figure this out.”

Two Spirit Guides:
The Tiger and the Butterfly.

I returned after a week, and he had some pictures and drawings ready for me. My attention was drawn two two pencil sketches, and I imagined what they would look like in color. They became my final choices. I left the coloration to the artist but they had to be “vibrant.”

That’s an interesting word we threw around during the sessions, “vibrant.” There are a number of meanings for the word “vibrant,” including full of energy and enthusiasm, spirited, lively, full of life, energetic, vigorous, vital, animated, dynamic, stimulating, passionate, fiery. They certainly apply to my choice of totems, and I thought, “They actually describe my personality, my soul.” As for the colors, they had to be bright and striking, vivid, strong, rich, bold. Oranges, blacks, yellows, greens taken individually didn’t do much to turn me on but then, much later, after the tattoos were finished, I noted one day when describing them to a workout partner, that they were really two poles, the warm and the cool, they were opposites working together. These two seemingly opposite animal types actually represented opposites and together worked a special dynamic.

Right Shoulder Art

As I became more fascinated by how naturally these many factors came together in a sort of symphony, conscious and unconscious, I felt I had to learn more about these symbols, which I felt were always part of me but now were physically part of me, visible for all to see, and doing their magic as part of me.

Body art is one of the earliest forms of artistic expression known to humankind. It has been used to indicate status, religious devotion, desired protection against evil and disease, and much more. At times, body art was, and in some cultures, still is stigmatized, being associated with marginal elements in society. Rightly so! Those of us who surrender ourselves to the needle and the pigment are marginal: we are in some, many ways metaphysically different.

Tattoos, I believe, are not just a way of turning your body into a living, moving billboard, and I believe that covering the body with a collage of multiple tattoos is actually ugly. I feel that quality should take precedence over quantity, and that each modification of the body should actually enhance the “beauty” of the body. Each and every modification made to our body should be done only after careful reflection and after having discerned the spiritual reason for making a permanent change to the already naturally beautiful form and substance of the body.

Left Shoulder Art

Like a jug, the container, the physical form gives shape, it’s the space within that gives it a purpose, a meaning. The same with the human being; the physical form, the shape is formed around purpose. Taking that thought a step further, it is what is within that shapes what we perceive an object or a person to be through the medium of the physical senses, but it’s not necessarily what the person in reality is in their being, their essence. Of all the many hypotheses offered by psychology and religion for Why? a person chooses to become a living palette for art one of them is older than psychology or even philosophy itself: it’s to express a certain spirituality, mysterious, wordless, powerful.

Today, people express many different reasons for getting various forms of body art. Some of them are a means of personal expression, while others continue to decorate their bodies as a means of commemorating an important event/time in their lives, or as in my case, a response to something mysterious working from within.

The Tiger Spirit Guide or Totem

The tiger is a symbol of passion, power, devotion. The tiger hunts at night, and night is the realm of the unconscious, of the deep mind, the spirit The tiger symbolizes  of sexual energies, which can be creative or destructive. But the tiger is also a fierce protector and guards the passions, allowing only the most loving sensual passions to emerge.

The tiger spirit not only produces the most loving, protective, sensual passions but also symbolizes new adventures, and the dynamic to pursue these challenges with focus and dedication.

William Blake recognized the mystique and the mystical about the tiger when he wrote, “Tiger, tiger, burning bright in the forests of the night, what immortal hand or eye dare frame thy fearful symmetry?” Blake reflects on the tiger symbolism as fiery. “burning bright”, in the unconscious realm, “in the forests of the night,” and fearsome, so much so that Blake ponders how powerful a Divine being would need to be to fashion such a creature that embodies beauty, symmetry, fierce power, awe-inspiring strength, and yet is fluid and balanced, passionate, dedicated, protective.  Metaphysical imagery frames the tiger as being associated with inner strength , and an almost predatory focus and courage.

Tiger also symbolizes a sort of unpredictability, and when the tiger is aroused and responds the results are swift, sure and decisive. Dealing with the tiger is not the time for making rash decisions or foolish moves. Choose your battles wisely, in other words.

While all of the above is certainly not negative, assuming you are respectful of the spiritual power you are dealing with, there is a clearly positive aspect: when you keep the tiger spirit close to you, in your life, the person embodying the tiger spirit can act as a powerful reminder of overcoming obstacles and fears by reclaiming a place of empowerment. The person embodying the tiger spirit has an ability to manage strong emotions effectively. There is a caveat, of course: some people would find the person embodying the tiger spirit to be unnerving, or might find themselves uncomfortable in the presence of such a person.  Such discomfort might indicate that they feel or threatened by the mystery or strength of the person or a situation, and that they might need to reassess their relationship with that person or situation.

When you encounter a person embodying the tiger as his spirit animal it is wise to treat the encounter with the utmost reverence. The tiger spirit will teach you patience – when to move, when to remain still and quiet, and in the end experience a successful “pursuit.” The tiger spirit will not tolerate carelessness or procrastination when the path is clear for the next great leap.

The person embodying the tiger spirit can provide his partner or companion with strength and support for nurturing great  spiritual growth. Watching, experiencing the man embodying the tiger spirit managing the many day-to-day challenges of life, great and small, can be likened to the tiger teaching its cubs to hunt, the challenges are learning tools. These can weary the spirit of the ordinary, insensitive person but the tiger spirit  stands ready with a raw power that urges the sensitive man forward. Just as the wild tiger in nature is known for his  amazing bursts of energy, the tiger spirit person can exploit that resource to confront any challenge.

The man embodying the tiger spirit yearns for adventure, and he can stare down a statue! There is little that can stand in his way when he focuses in on something. The tiger spirit can be overwhelming if it is not received by a partner or companion with courage and respect; while the tiger spirit is controlled and focused, moderated by a strong sense of right, compassion, empathy and sensitivity, it can roll over weaker spirits who don’t have the good sense to make way. The temptation to stand and oppose the tiger spirit, asserting one’s self for the sake of the ego, the false self, typically happens early in the spiritual relationship. As you mature with Tiger, that temptation to assert comes under greater control. In the meanwhile use a chrysoprase crystal to help cope with any anxiety or discomfort arroused in the early stages of the relationship with Tiger.

If your significant other embodies the tiger as his spirit animal your relationship and sexual expressions are or will be very intense. He will love you completely in his focused way; you will fill a very special niche in his life but don’t make the fatal mistake of expecting to fill all the niches of his life; you’ll burn out trying. He will cherish you fully for what you are, and he will have a strong desire to parent and to protect. This is why a man embodying the tiger spirit is ideal in a relationship between an older “daddy” type man and a younger “son” or “mister” type man. Tigers excel in their mentoring and protection roles and keep their partners close for sharing, intimacy, and spirituality.


The Vibrant Healing Properties of Green – The Chrysoprase Crystal

It might now be appropriate to say a word here about the chrysoprase crystal if a tiger spirit has found its way into your life. The entry of a person embodying the tiger spirit into your life will usually signal a significant change, since most people are attracted to a tiger spirit because they sense the power, sensitivity, and strength of the tiger spirit. Again, when dealing with any tiger situation, caution is advised; you can easily become a meal. When attracted to the tiger spirit, you should take it as a sign that you may be in need of and must be willing to enter into a physically,  emotionally and spiritually transformative experience. This is where the chrysoprase crystal may provide you with some energetic support.

The chrysoprase crystal is sought out for manifesting optimism, joy, and happiness; it is an effective prescription for encouraging a more positive outlook on life.

If anxiety and uncertainty roll in on gale-force winds rattling the shingles of your natural tranquility, it’s time cuddle close to your tiger spirit man and to keep your chrysoprase crystal close, reflecting on meaning meditating on the heart chakra. The activation of this energy center allows for a stronger flow of healing energy through the heart, and brings you closer to living from the heart and draws on the universal power of erotic love and inner beauty.

Chrysoprase is a variety of chalcedony, and was a favorite of Alexander the Great, who called on its spiritual healing powers during his campaigns. To me, that’s a persuasive pedigree.

The chrysoprase crystal is part of the pale blue green color ray. Imagine tropical emerald waters brushing against white sands at the edge of the forest, the abode of the tiger spirit, your protection and source of sensuality. In a meditation, let the stone transport your spirit there anytime, and you can reach out to the man embodying the tiger spirit. Let his ancient wisdom guide you to a divine light of inner truth and enlightenment as you float down a turquoise river of inner peace, illuminated with a brilliant white light, the white light of pure love generated by a pure heart.

Love means self-sacrifice, letting go when necessary, taking back control from the ego. There’s always the perception that there’s a fine line between self-preservation and letting go of the urge to control, living for the other, controlling the urge to possess; the cooling and healing properties generated by the chrysoprase crystal are beneficial for supporting the delicate balance of emotions. Forgive and learn, or be emotionally paralyzed. Chrysoprase can remind us how good it feels to be free of toxic emotions and the stresses of consumerism and materialism. The man embodying the tiger-spirit cherishes a balanced state of mind, a state of spiritual alignment, and that state is a first step towards healing your former defective spirit,

Concentrate on your pure and self-less intention, on surrender, on forgiveness, positive inner growth, or encouraging hope in your life.

The heart chakra stones such as chrysoprase, rose quartz and jade are thought to attract the abundance of Eros, which associates it closely with challenges of erotic relationships and the creative force they incarnate.

The vibrant green in the eye of the tiger is reminiscent of the chrysoprase crystal and its energies.

The man embodying the tiger spirit can be a natural guide for you in times when you feel confused, particularly morally or ethically. If he is your partner or companion, you have great wealth to draw on and the tiger man is very freely giving and generous, not looking to exact anything but your love, loyalty, trust in return.

Tiger men have an independent streak – and need periodic alone time even if his  partner thinks he understands him completely. Know from the start you can’t chain or tame a tiger, you have to let him be a tiger. Gratefully accept the space you occupy in his life, try not to be demanding, it’s not necessary. The tiger spirit anticipates and reads your needs even before you know them yourself. Do not try to change the tiger man; to change him would be likened to attempting to change the stripes on a living tiger. Do not try to cage the tiger man; he’ll break free in an instant. Be still, quiet, patient like the tiger spirit.

Wild Tigers have excellent night vision. Applied to the man embodying the tiger spirit, that spirit’s spiritual effects improve at night by the light of the moon; the tiger spirit is at home in the dark forest of the unconscious, the home of the passions. Tigers, like other cats, also respond deeply to touch; the man with the tiger spirit will place great meaning on being touched, explored, and responding with touch and exploration. The tiger spirit’s touch is not restricted to the physical but is equally at home in the psychological and the spiritual. If you’re not into touching and being touched, steer clear of the man embodying a tiger spirit.

The Tiger’s Eye

Many people embodying the tiger spirit animal carry the image of the tiger when they are embarking on a quest or an adventure or confronting a challenge! This is particularly opportune for the man wanting to immerse himself in a new environment or relationship, in studies, or in other cultures with all their novel believes and values. The fact that tigers have excellent hearing also applies to the man embodying the tiger spirit: he hears everything, even the unsaid, and is an excellent listener. A partner with keen sense of hearing and listening skills makes the experience all the more rewarding because the unsaid or innocuous small things that others might miss are picked up by the tiger man. What you might think may be on the edge of awareness will be in the tiger man’s clear peripheral vision.

Call on Tiger as your Power Animal when you need renewed confidence. There is nothing uncertain with Tiger energy and medicine – this cat is the perfect embodiment of elegant power. As Tiger energy guides she teaches self-actualization – you begin to feel comfortable in your own skin and even revel in it. That is why Tigers often come to those who have poor body images or low self-esteem. Tiger men are also valuable partners and companion to those who are addicted to consumerism and materialism, or to rivalries that sap a man’s inner and outer strength. The tiger man’s sense of balance, harmony and fluidity are a source of security to those who might feel lost, confused, drowning.

In terms of spiritual growth and awareness, Tiger is all about keeping your eye on the prize. Whatever your goals are energetically, Tiger as a Power Animal provides tireless discipline and energy. From a Shamanic standpoint Tiger symbolizes healing, the immune system and clearing environmental toxins from your system. The tiger man is an excellent detoxifier, energizer, and source of empowerment.

Butterfly Symbolism & Meaning

When a man embodying the butterfly spirit begins visiting your life, something new and wonderful is about to unfold! It’s time for personal growth and greater awareness of your mental, physical and spiritual being. Change can sometimes be challenging and confusing because it moves us out of our comfort zone but you  cannot embrace a “new” until you release the “old” you. The man embodying the butterfly spirit can show you that can fly confidently above and beyond the obstacles, physical, psychological and spiritual, that would otherwise hold you back.

The man embodying the butterfly spirit as a mentor will place considerable emphasis on movement –from one state in our physical, psychological and spiritual exploration to another, more advanced level.

The butterfly spirit helps us to turn our thoughts inward to review our character, morals and habits and to move closer to identifying our natural self, our pure self that is our unique self and not a product of what others want to make of us.

The outcome of the relationship with the butterfly-spirit endowed ally is a positive restoration to an enlightened being, relieved of excess baggage, you can dance Eros’ dance with unbridled love!

The butterfly spirit as an animal guide spirit has many appearances and attributes. Early Christians interpreted the butterfly in nature as a symbol representing the soul and its journey. Native Americans venerate the butterfly as the symbol of transformation, happiness and the diversity of nature. In Chinese tradition newlyweds were often given gifts bearing two Butterfly images to symbolize marital happiness and harmony, probably because of the bilateral symmetry of the butterfly’s wings and their rhythmic beating in flight.

The man embodying the butterfly spirit emphasizes simplicity and simplification. For the butterfly spirit it’s simple: just go back and care for the basics. The butterfly spirit doesn’t change nor does he want to change his partner. Like the butterfly in the field, he visits his partner and tastes his sweetness but doesn’t damage or change him. The man embodying the butterfly spirit tends those in his life just like the butterfly tends the flowers in the field; he opens his senses to the nectar and aroma of living in the moment and sharing that moment, reciprocally, with his partner. When possible he savors and rests; do what you can now. At other times, he lingers searching, mindful that quality learning and relationship rarely happens in one visitation. Slow, mindful changes are the ones that last a lifetime, laying the foundations for enlightenment and self-actualization. The butterfly spirit held within will emerge from its inner work when the time is right, with fresh insights and intentions to guide his partner to the next stage in his spiritual growth.

The butterfly spirit embodied in a man whispers softly of his hidden potentials but frequently these will surface on their own when needed, that is, when the time is right. We can recall the proverb that says, “There’s nothing in a caterpillar that knows it’s going to be a butterfly.” But the awesome transformation from caterpillar to winged beauty happens, and it happens quite naturally. Before this can happen, however, the caterpillar eats voraciously as only a caterpillar can do. So, too, the man embodying the butterfly spirit, while still in the caterpillar stage, feeds his soul voraciously with new  experiences, new knowledge, until it’s ready for integrating  new truths.

As the butterfly in nature is the picture of happiness and vision. The man embodying the butterfly spirit brings a spiritual lightness to being; he brings a vision that provides vital color and greater clarity.

The butterfly in nature and unusually keen visual perception and can even see wavelengths invisible to human beings, such as ultraviolet light.  The man embodying the butterfly spirit, too, has keen vision and can see colors most others can’t perceive; he glimpses angels as well as demons.

The man blessed with the butterfly spirit has a natural lightness of spirit! He loves natural beauty and the beauty of nature, and is guided by the what is morally and ethically good when it comes to maintaining balance in relationships, the environment, the cosmos.

The man embodying the butterfly spirit is by nature social, engaging, attractive and vibrant. He endeavors to live in the moment, and to live each moment fully; he celebrates life and like the wild goose in migration follows an invisible path to his destination.

Spread Your Wings!

The beauty in life is the opportunity for transformation, for movement. Every moment brings a change, we just have to be awake to take advantage of the meaning and the growth it offers. The butterfly spirit can manage radical, complete change and facilitates the process with gentleness, regenerating breezes and a kiss of beauty.

During migration, monarch butterflies will travel thousands of miles and will amazingly find their “ancestral” trees; the monarch ‘grandchild’ or even ‘great-great grandchild’ butterfly will find the exact same spot that their grandparents sheltered in after their migration.

This ancestral behavior or cellular memory of their ancestor’s behavior observed in the monarch butterfly is analogous to the butterfly spirit’s exploitation of traditional or ancestral wisdom by tapping into ancient knowledge in the repository of archetypal, collective consciousness.


I hope that this article has inspired you to look into yourself to find your animal spirit guide, and to discover how that inner power can make you a better, more beautiful person for yourself, for your partner, for the entire universe.

Namasté! Peace to you!
William

A Prologue

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Touch is Communication, Inquiry, Exploration.

Welcome, Friend:

This blog is about gay male relationship and spirituality, a Tantra of Gay Companionship.

Please make this effort a success by sharing honestly and generously.

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William