This blog is actually intended to be a forum for writing about and discussing the spirituality or “Tantra” of male companionship, especially intimacy and surrender to one’s partner and abandoning one’s self to one’s partner’s ministrations.
The words pedicatio and irrumatio are taken from the Latin and are translated by “anal intercourse” and “thrusting into the mouth”, a sort of “active” fellatio. I chose these two words for their novelty value and because they are not as crude as the English equivalents.
I must admit, though, that because pedicatio and irrumatio were associated with pagan culture by Christians they got a bad rap throughout history and ancient authors were selected who disparaged the practices. The fact remains, though, that both practices were widely accepted and practiced in the ancient world. Even today, they are popular practices of sexual expression among gays and straights as well.
I am active in my role, although under the right conditions, I know I would enjoy being passive in both pedicatio and irrumatio. Much depends on trust and how the relationship evolves between two “tantric” companions, and the mutual understanding of the concepts of vulnerability, surrender, abandonment, and trust are developed between the companions.
Trust is paramount in my concept of gay “tantric” sexual spirituality and the male mystique. Once there is mutual trust, there is ecstasy in vulnerability, surrender and abandonment. With mutual trust we can experience a whole new level of liberty and enlightenment, which is something we don’t usually associate with our erotic sharing.
Pedicatio and irrumatio, while active, do not necessarily have to imply dominance or violence. Far from it. As I plan to lay out the relationship plan we will engage in a conversation in which we will divorce ourselves from some commonly held, and damaging, concepts of what it means to be a gay male in our western culture. We will explore gentleness, silence, touch, aroma and scent, hygiene, authenticity, humility, gratitude, non-competition, concern for the other, and many other key issues.
I will advocate and talk about discipline and simplicity as key elements to our discovery of one’s hidden true self and how we can, as spiritually mature gay men, practice a spirituality of liberation.
By removing the stigma, the anxiety, the expectations, the social addictions, the consumerism and the materialism from our intimate and sharing moments, we can ascend into compassionate and gentle presence and service, nurturing all that is valuable in our male partner(s), while growing in mind, body, and spirit.
It’s a great approach to something very elemental but very profoundly male and it’s something that if accepted is attainable and highly desirable.
Welcome to the journey! Let’s do it together!